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Jak turned to and fro, allowing the shower spray to wash away the lather from his body. When he looked up, and saw Ron watching him, he grinned. "What, you've never seen a naked guy before?" he teased. He thrust his hips forward, as he cradled his scrotum with one hand and slowly ran the other over his flat belly, to his chest, pleased, both with his thickening penis, and the openly admiring expression of the man standing at his side. Ron laughed nervously, and Jak turned away. 'Damn!' he thought, as he watched the muscles of Jak's back and buttocks flex. 'I've been dreaming of being partnered with the guy; yet, here I am, thinking about Soren's partner, and the expression in his eyes, as he did his best to put on a brave face, knowing I would be having sex with the man he loves. 'For his part, Soren isn't much better. He's using his . . . personality . . . in an attempt to push his thoughts of Keith to the back of his mind. It must be difficult for him, knowing Keith feels bad. But . . . what is he supposed to do? 'Keith's stronger than he thinks he is. In fact,' Ron thought, as he caught Jak watching him, 'of the two, Soren and Keith, I believe Keith is the stronger. He's not covering anything up. What you see, when you meet him, is exactly what you get. Soren is another matter all together. What you see, on the surface, is nothing more than the surface. I wonder what sort of person he is beneath the veneer of supreme confidence.' Ron compressed his lips. 'Now's not the time to be worrying about things like that, though. Soren and I have a job to do, and I'm going to enjoy it. 'Thousands upon thousands of guys, who follow the site, would give anything to be here in my place; yet, here I am!' "Eat your hearts out!" he wanted to shout. Jak held Ron by the shoulder, surprising him by the touch. 'I didn't think Soren knew we were already being filmed. He's acting like he does, though.' "Y'missed a spot," he said, using his hands to lather Ron's neck, shoulders, and back, humming, deep in his throat, as he worked the muscles with his fingertips. When Ron trembled, the humming became a soft chuckle. "Y'like?" he asked, as he abandoned the massage and soaped-up the cleft between Ron's ass cheeks. "Hmm?" he teased, as he ran a couple fingers over the blond man's hole. Having totally surrendered himself to what was taking place, all Ron could do was loosely nod. 'After being with Soren,' he thought, 'a guy is ruined . . . for life. Anyone else will . . . always . . . be compared . . . with him.' "Damn, you're sexy," Jak said, loosely wrapping Ron in an embrace, slowly pulling him closer until they were skin-to-skin. He ran a forefinger over the whisker-stubble on Ron's jaw, and grinned, his eyes sparkling. "Love the beard . . . handsome," he said, then licked across the stubble until he met, and paused at, Ron's open mouth, and found his tongue. 'Fuuuuck,' Ron inwardly groaned, 'he's giving my face and neck a tongue-bath. Soren licked over his chin and open mouth, and pulled Ron closer, lewdly grinding their erections together. His fingers, as they dug into the muscles of Ron's buttocks, were as demanding as his tongue. The two men would kiss, then part, breathing heavily, as they looked into one another's eyes, before they returned to another kiss. Without warning, Soren shut off the water to his shower, and took the couple steps to where two towels were hanging, the muscles of his untanned buttocks flexing with each confident step. "Here!" he called, tossing a thick white towel in Ron's direction, his voice reverberating in the suddenly silent room. "Hurry up. I wanna feel you inside me." "Huh?" Ron quietly whimpered. 'In . . . in . . . you?' he silently asked, not quite believing his ears. 'I get t'fuck you? F'real?' He glanced to one of the cameras stationed around the room, wondering what Dave was thinking. 'This isn't going at all the way Dave wanted.' "Y'hear me?" Jak asked, turning back. He held Ron's head steady, with both hands, and licked a broad swath over his jaw and open mouth, before meeting Ron's lips for an aggressively deep kiss, which ended as abruptly as it had begun. Without another word, or checking to make sure he was being followed, Jak turned, tossed his towel into a large wicker basket, and left the room. "Um," Ron glanced from side to side, speaking to himself, as he hurriedly dried. "I guess he wants t'be fucked." His damp towel joined Jak's, as he hurried out of the shower room, brushing his blond hair away from his forehead. "Whoa," he couldn't help but murmur, when he came into the bedroom video-set and saw Soren, lying on the bed, propping himself up on his elbows, his legs spread wide, his feet resting on the floor. "Suck it," he ordered, nodding to his erection. "Then, use my juice as lube to fuck me." Ron's eyes shifted from the thick erection to Soren's face, then back to the drooling cock. 'Alright,' he thought, 'two can play at this domineering game.' He noticed the corners of Soren's lips twitch, as if he, too, wondered how Ron would respond to the demands. Ron leaned forward and grasped Soren's cock at the base, then squeezed upward, milking out a thick droplet of clear pre-cum for the camera. Other than that slight acknowledgment of Dave's and Levi's sudden appearance, both Soren and Ron ignored the cameramen, who'd been waiting in the set. "If you want me to suck it," Ron murmured, loud enough for the microphone. "Make me," he teased, as he smeared the pre-cum over the head of Soren's cock, then brought it to his lips, pausing only long enough for Levi to get a close-up before he licked his finger. Before Ron finished cleaning the pre-cum off the finger, though, Soren grabbed him, and threw him onto his back in the middle of the bed. "Playing at being a tough man, are we?" he said, his voice husky with growing passion. He straddled the surprised man, pushing his shoulders against the bed. "Hmm?" he asked, before leaning forward, giving Levi a great view of his spread cheeks, swinging scrotum, and Ron's thick erection. Nearby, Dave was moving in close as he filmed Soren's, and Ron's aggressive kisses. Ron bucked his hips upward, rubbing the head of his erection against Soren's hole. 'Damn, I'd like to lick that,' Levi thought, surprising himself by thinking about one of his models in a sexual way. He'd been turned-on, of course, by many of the models, but had never . . . once . . . wished he were able to participate. 'Leave it to Jak to bring out that side of me,' he thought, forcing his mind back to his job. "I said . . . make me," Ron grunted, as he pushed Jak off and rolled to the side, reversing positions and trying to push Jak to the bed. Jak would have none of it, though, and, with surprising strength, pushed Ron away and, once again, straddled the prone man, only this time sitting on his face. "Lick my butthole," he ordered, then squirmed slightly, as he felt Ron's tongue penetrate him. Dave hurried to get a better angle, and, as Jak held his scrotum and erection aside, filmed Ron madly working on Jak's hole. "Now, this," Jak said, as he pushed his cock into Ron's throat. "Oh yeah," he sighed, as he continued to straddle Ron, on hands and knees, and did his best to not look at the camera. Instead, he leaned forward and began to slowly nurse on Ron's erection. 'That's it, Jak,' Levi murmured, to himself. 'Go slowly. Ron's so turned on, if you don't watch it, he'll pop, and you won't get what you're wanting.' Nearby, Dave had his own thoughts, as he watched Jak raise and lower his hips, fucking Ron's face, while exposing his hairless asshole with each movement. 'Fuck, but Keith is a lucky guy! If this is any indication of what his and Jak's lovemaking is like, I'm surprised either of 'em have any energy left for anything else.' "Oh, yeah . . . oh, yeah," Jak repeated, a moment before he tensed, and gave Dave a great view of his cock pulsing out an enormous load into his partner's mouth. Ron, unaccustomed to Jak's prodigious orgasms, choked, allowing some of the thick juice to escape, and run over the side of his cheek. "Now, it's your turn," Jak said, rolling off his still-dazed partner, onto his back. He pulled his knees back to his shoulders, giving Levi, the perfect view of Jak fingering his own hole, while Ron knelt close-by and drooled out the load he'd been holding in his mouth. 'Holy . . .' Dave thought, drawing out the word in his mind. 'No wonder the poor guy was choking! You'd think Soren hadn't popped in a week!' Ron coated his own erection with the thick juice, and slowly slid into his partner, propping himself up on one extended arm, while giving Jak his sperm-covered hand to lick clean. "Ohhhh," Jak sighed, on an exhaled breath, as Ron sank the full depth of his erection into him. He ever-so-slowly withdrew, then began to thrust in an unhurried rhythm, which, if Jak's writhing and groans were any indication, were driving the prone man crazy. 'Having sex with Soren changes a person,' Levi thought, as he filmed Ron's erection stretching the hairless hole. 'He gives as much as he gets, or more, and always leaves his partner feeling as if he's the most desirable man on the face of the earth. No wonder he's so popular with the Site's members. Each of them imagines himself being with Soren, and, even if all they're doing is watching on a computer screen, they come away from the experience, feeling as if they're somehow special; that Soren has . . . somehow . . . spoken to them. For the men, like Ron, who have actually been with him, well . . . no wonder they almost beg to return and repeat the experience.' Ron's blue eyes met Soren's, Dave's camera catching the passion and silent communication, a moment before Ron's body trembled, and he began filling Soren's hole. "Oh yeah," Soren sighed, wrapping his legs around Ron's waist and pulling him close, while they kissed. Eventually, both spent, Ron withdrew and rolled onto his back at Soren's side, with a whoosh of expelled breath. Soren turned onto his side, propping himself up on an elbow, as he leaned close and murmured thanks, while, at the same time, giving Levi a perfect view of the semen escaping his hole. As if by some prearranged agreement, both Levi and Dave stopped filming, and left the studio-set, hurrying back to the house. Jak laughed, as he half-lay on top of Ron and nuzzled the crook of Ron's neck. "I wonder where they're going." "Ummmm," Ron sighed, as he tenderly kissed Soren's lips. "That was way beyond awesome." "Hmmmm," Jak hummed, in agreement, but all he was thinking of was . . . Keith. * * * Keith and Daniel stood face-to-face with Lolita, one of the Miami Seaquarium's killer whales. "I wonder what she's thinking," Keith murmured, mesmerized by the enormous beast. "Yummmm, the sort'a-blond guy looks good enough t'eat," Daniel supplied. "I know that's what I'd say." Keith flicked a questioning look at the man standing at his side. "Do you suppose a killer whale thinks with your accent?" "I don't have an accent," Daniel complained. "Everyone else does. Besides, I don't imagine killer whales do a whole lot of deep thinking." Daniel had no sooner cast doubt on Lolita's intellect, when the enormous beast beat its tail against the water, splashing the two men, and everyone else standing nearby. The children squealed in delight, while their parents did their best to protect their cameras and video recorders. "Whoa!" Daniel laughed, as he shook himself, sending water droplets flying. "Sorry, girl!" Keith pointed. "Us getting wet was his fault," he called, to everyone standing nearby. "He called the big lady in the water a dummy." "Do it again!" many of the children shouted, until their parents hustled them away, to see the sharks, or whatever. "Are you guys brothers, or something? I noticed the hats," the man who Keith had asked to take his and Daniel's photograph, asked, as the two young men stood close, their arms resting on one another's shoulders. "No. He's my good buddy," Daniel smiled brightly, feeling drunk with the wonderful time he was having. "We have the caps with the different initials to help us remember who's who." "Whom," Keith corrected. "No, I'm Daniel. Whom was my brother," Daniel immediately responded, noting Keith's mischievous smile. Keith sadly shook his head, easily falling into the fun. "The news about Whom and Lolita the killer whale," he looked over his shoulder at the animal, "was tragic, don't you think?" he asked, turning back to the onlooker. "What?" the man asked. "No. I was talking about Whom, Daniel's brother. What, is his father!" Keith added. "He's a swimming instructor," Daniel answered, "Here at the Seaquarium." Keith sadly shook his head. "He had nothing to do with the . . . accident. At least, that's what the newspapers say. Still . . . poor Whom." "Before you ask, When's, my mom's name," Daniel told the man. "That's what she's always asking. Well, that, and, 'Give me patience.' I was the only normal one in the whole family." "Normal? You?" Keith hooted, glancing at the man who'd earlier taken their picture and was now staring at them as if they were escapees from . . . the home. "Well, I'm certainly more normal than Where." "Let me guess . . . your sister?" the man interrupted. "Nope. Where's, my other brother?" "How should I know?" Keith murmured, ingenuously smiling, when both the man and Daniel turned to him. "And, lastly, How Much, is my sister," Daniel added, with finality. "I don't know that either. Is she for sale?" Keith asked, stifling a laugh, as the man's incredulous expression grew. "Yep. She's a hooker," Daniel explained, in a deadpan voice. "Aah. The happy family . . . Whom, What, When, Where, and How Much. With a name like Daniel, it's no wonder you've always had an identity problem." Keith laughed, as the tourist scurried back to his family, glancing over his shoulder, as if to see if he was being followed. "Well . . . he's confused," Daniel mused. "Same here. You're crazy, y'know," Keith teased "Am not. You are." "That goes without saying. Cody said the same thing, the other day." He lowered his voice. "Keith," he intoned, imitating Cody and ignoring the looks of the other tourists nearby, "you're certifiably crazy." He shook his head, returning his voice to the normal pleasant tenor. "Just 'cause I asked him if he thought I should change my name to Hank, since it fits my macho-ness better than Keith. I knew a dog once, named Hank. A mean bastard if there ever was one. Sort'a like me. Grrrr." he growled, as he leaned close to Daniel, who twisted away, unsure what the . . . crazy . . . man would do. Daniel barked a laugh. "Macho? You?" "That's what Jak always says, just before he bursts out laughing and does his best to wrestle me to the ground." Keith sadly shook his head. "I would have won, too, if it hadn't been for an old debate team injury." Daniel snorted. "Hmm. Those debate teams have quite a reputation. Rough," he laughed, playfully punching Keith on the shoulder. "I'm having a great time, Keith . . . hanging out with you. Prob'ly the best time I've ever had in Miami." * * * "You were thinking of him, weren't you . . . while we were fucking, I mean?" Jak jerked a small nod, not meeting the blond man's eyes, as they stood side-by-side, in the shower. "No worries," Ron said, his voice nearly drowned out by the sound of the spraying water. "It's a compliment . . . really. "What's really bothering you? I thought our scene together was great." Jak grinned. "Yeah, me too. You really know how to use that thing," he nodded to Ron's flaccid penis. "So?" Ron pressed. Jak shrugged. "I dunno . . . really. Every time I come down here, I get into one of these funks . . . about something. I thought having Keith with me would help things out, but . . ." he shrugged, then grinned. "If anything, I'm feeling worse. "I know a woman who would claim what I'm feeling is angst, and tell me to get over it and move on. Easy for her to say." "Is there anything I can do to help out?" "Nah. Thanks, though." Ron wrapped Jak in an embrace and quickly kissed him on the cheek. "Well, if you think of something, or just need someone to listen, I'm available. You've got to be one of the luckiest men I've ever met," Ron continued. When Jak raised his brows in a silent request for an explanation, Ron smiled. "You are a great guy, who's unaffected by all the attention being paid him. You're sexy as hell. You're loved and in love, with an outstanding man, and, to hear Levi talking, you've got an awesome father. Did he really go with you to meet Levi when you were hired?" "Yeah, it was my idea, not his, and I'm being affected by all this more than I wish. "But, back to Dad. I asked him to go with me to meet Levi, 'cause I was afraid I was being blinded by the idea of meeting guys like you, and the money n'all, and wasn't thinking straight. Dad and I have always had a close relationship. After meeting Levi and the guys, if he'd thought something wasn't quite right, he'd have told me, and left it up to me to decide what I wanted to do. "I call him almost every night, to let him know how things are going, and telling him about the vids I've worked on, n'stuff." "You tell your father about the sex?" Jak laughed. "Sure! Do you think I shouldn't? He's seen the site and at least a couple of vids I've done. So's my younger brother. He fancies himself being one of Levi's big stars of the future." "Following in his brother's footsteps?" Ron asked, smiling when Jak seemed surprised by the question. "He'd be a real star." "And you're not? Come on! Deep down, you know you are. Is that what's troubling you? You're bothered by the attention you're receiving, aren't you? Why?" "It's changing me in ways I don't want to be changed. I'm afraid of becoming a guy I don't much think I'd like to know, and if I don't like me, I can't expect Keith to like me. The trouble is, I don't know what started it, much less how to stop it." "In what ways are you becoming the sort'a guy Keith wouldn't like to know?" Jak shrugged. "You don't want t'talk about it . . . right?" "I don't know what there is to talk about! My feelings are all jumbled up." "Have you talked with Keith about what you're feeling . . . your fears n'all?" Jak bowed his head. "Naw." "Why not? If you can't talk to him, maybe you should talk to your dad, or brother, or Levi. Something's bothering you. Talking about things can sometimes let you sort things out. "Maybe you really do know what's bothering you, on a gut level, and are too afraid to admit it to yourself. Y'think?" Ron asked, then held up a hand to prevent a response he could see forming. "Just something to think about." He shut off his shower, gave Jak a quick kiss on the cheek, and left the room. * * * "Have you been working for Levi for very long?" Keith asked the man across the table, and the remains of the enormous seafood dinner. "I've been with him about a year, I guess. It's been fun. I love sex, so this is a great job." "Have you and . . . Soren?" Daniel bowed his head. "Yes, I'm sorry." "Ron said the same thing, earlier today. There's no reason to be. Y'know, I was really afraid to come down here and meet you guys. I'd imagined you all were some sort of supermen, or something. I couldn't figure out why Jak . . ." He stopped speaking, his eyes wide. "I wasn't supposed to use his name." "It's okay. I'm Blake. Besides, you mentioned his name earlier. "Oh . . . Um . . . I'm Keith." "Cody was joking that you wanted to be called Hank?" Keith smiled. "Yeah, well, I was just trying to make the guy laugh. Names are a big thing down here. Even though I now know yours, I won't use it, okay? Otherwise, I might slip. I'm not accustomed to everyone having two names." "So, we're not as intimidating as you thought we'd be," Daniel asked, returning to the abandoned subject of a few minutes earlier. "Well . . . Cody's a little intimidating, just 'cause I'm not sure what's going on in his head. You and Ron are just great guys." "Thanks. I think you're pretty great, too." Keith bowed his head. "Yeah, well. Um . . . you were going to tell me about getting into this business." "I was doing a strip routine at a party. I'd been hired to strip naked and get hard, and sort'a give the guys a thrill. It was a guys-only party. I'm not too good about getting hard at ones where women are present." Keith nodded his understanding. "Anyhow, Levi was at the party. Afterward, he asked if I'd be interested in being one of his models. The pay's good, and I get to be naked a lot of the time, so that's great. Also, what can I say, I love guy-guy sex." "What do you plan to do . . . after?" Daniel shrugged. "I don't know. I suppose I'll have to get serious about life. Having sex for a living can only go on for so long before people get tired of seeing me. Same's true of stripping n'stuff." He looked up and grinned. "Maybe I'll get lucky and meet someone like you, eh?" "The guy'll be lucky t'find you," Keith said, feeling slightly embarrassed by the nearness of such a sexy man. Daniel slowly grinned, as if he could read Keith's mind. "Thanks." "So . . . ahem . . . Levi asked if you wanted to be a model." Daniel thought back to being approached by Levi. "I didn't think I was model material. I mean, I don't look anything like those guys in magazines, but Levi convinced me, and I decided to give it a shot. "The next day, I met with him, Dave, and Pete for an audition. Those three were in a relationship, until Pete was called home, 'cause of his father's death." Keith nodded, having heard the story. "Well, the unthinkable happened. There I was, a guy who would strip naked and get hard for strangers, and I couldn't get it up! I was mortified!" "Levi was cool, though. He asked what I thought of whenever I jerked-off. I told him about arranging it so I would accidentally forget to close my bedroom door, and give a show for my brother or my dad. He asked what I was thinking about while they were watching. "Fucking someone," I answered, without a thought. "'Well,' Pete pipes up. 'I can help out with that!'" "'What?' I thought, 'The guy's gonna let me plug him?' Just thinking about it caused my dick to stir, and by the time Pete stripped and lubed his butthole, I was fully hard. I'm sort'a large, but ol' Pete didn't have any trouble with it. He just squatted over my dick and sat down, without so much as a wince. 'Damn,' I thought. 'This is mega-cool.' "I like t'be in control of things, so I used some old high school wrestling moves and had him on his back with his legs in the air, in nothing flat." He grinned. "I half expected to hear people cheering, like they did at wrestling meets, when I did that move. Anyhow, I like that position, 'cause I can get in real deep. Most guys can't take it, but ol' Pete was begging me to slam into him harder. I'd completely forgotten about Levi and Dave, watching me fuck their lover." "Uuuu, sounds hot." "He was milking me, Keith! I'd never been milked before. I felt like I had a tight rubber band, or something, around my thing, so it didn't take me long before I growled and unloaded in him." "Wow," Keith said, in amazement. "I'm hard just listening to you talk about it. What'd Levi do?" Daniel grinned. "He was ready to call it a day, but I wasn't. I mean, Pete hadn't shot yet. If someone's gotten me off, it's only right I do the same for them. So, before Pete could get up, I turned around and dangled my nuts and slimy dick over his face, for him to lick, as I sucked him off. It was awesome, having that dick of his in my mouth as he sucked on my balls and cleaned my cock. He spread his legs, and I could see my juice leaking out onto the bed." Daniel shook his head. "What a turn on. In no time at all, wham, he unloaded in my mouth." Both men looked up as someone tentatively approached. "Excuse me, but you're Daniel, right?" Daniel smiled and nodded, accustomed to the notoriety, just as Jak was. "Could I have your autograph?" "Sure thing!" Daniel asked the guy's name, and signed the paper, he'd been given, with a flourish. He was ready to hand it back, but the man nodded to Keith. "Um, you must be new. Could I have yours, too?" "I'm not new; I'm a nobody." "You won't be a nobody for long." Daniel nodded toward the paper. "Go ahead. Have some fun." Keith took the pen, thought a moment, then scrawled his autograph. "To Ben, a great guy. Your friend . . . Hank." * * * "I wonder where Keith and Daniel are," Jak asked, to no one in particular. "I thought they'd be back by now." Ron exchanged a glance with Levi and Dave. "Um . . . I got a text from Daniel a while back," Dave said, into the silence. "He told me they'd been down on the waterfront, watching one of the cruise liners dock. I expect they'll be back any time now." "You're off tomorrow, Soren. It'll be a good time for the two of you to go out exploring, or whatever. You're free to use my car, if you wish. Or, you can hang around here, or on the beach . . . whatever you prefer." As if on cue, the men heard the distinctive sound of Levi's sports car pulling into the driveway. "Well . . . the whole neighborhood knows whomever is driving my car is back!" Levi winced, as the car's engine roared, a final time, then went silent. "I hope he didn't get a ticket." A moment later, the two laughing men came through the courtyard gate, laden with souvenirs. "Looks like they've been shopping," Dave chuckled, as Jak stood and crossed the grass, drawn to Keith as if he were a magnet. Daniel left Keith behind, greeting the men at the table with a few subdued words, then sat and watched, as Keith and Jak embraced and kissed. 'What is all this about?' Ron wondered. 'Cody's watching Soren, Daniel's watching Keith, while Levi and Dave are watching everyone . . . but me. Hell, I feel left out! 'It doesn't take someone with lots'a brains to know something happened while Daniel and Keith were touring the town. Maybe Keith isn't aware of it, but Daniel sure is.' Ron watched in silence, as Levi studied Daniel's reaction to the two men's greeting, then saw the look of worry he and Dave exchanged. "Hey, Daniel," Ron said, breaking the tense silence. Both Daniel and Cody seemed to tear themselves away from the silent homecoming scene. "Did you guys have a good time? What'd you do?" "Yeah, a great time," he responded, doing his best to act nonchalant as Jak and Keith returned to the table, hand-in-hand. He tried to grin, as Levi caught his eye, then laughed. "Before you ask. No, no tickets today, but geez, that car sounds sweet." "Hey, Keith," Dave said, in greeting, as Jak sat, with his partner at his side. "Cool cap. I seem to have seen one something like it, somewhere." "Nice huh? Daniel gave it to me." "Have you eaten?" Jak asked. "I've eaten more than I normally do in a week! We ate at that Seaquarium place. I kept trying to figure out if what I was eating was some sort of animal I'd seen on display, swimming around in one of those big tanks of water. A guy asked Daniel for his autograph. I'm surrounded by stars!" He turned to Jak. "How'd things go here?" "Fine. Ron n'I did our thing; then we joined Cody and Hector, and ran around on the beach. Since we got cleaned up, we've just been hanging out, helping with dinner n'stuff." "Could I help do the dishes, or something?" Keith asked. "I've been having fun all day; I need to feel useful." He turned to Jak. "Could you n'I do stuff tomorrow, if you're not scheduled for anything?" He dug in one of the bags he'd carried to the table. "I've got a tour book! There are lots'a places to see! It's amazing to think it's prob'ly snowing, or something, back home, and here we are lounging around . . . outside . . . in shorts!" He laughed. "I love it!" He leaned close, and kissed Jak on the cheek, then heaved himself out of the comfortable chair. "Alright, let's do some dishes." "Sort of a take-charge kind of guy, isn't he?" Levi mused. "While you're doing that, I'll give the guys a lift back to their hotels," Dave said. "And, I'll give Dad a call and see how he and Rex are doing," Jak said. "Thanks for showing me around t'day," Keith said, giving Daniel a brief hug. "It was lots'a fun." "Yeah, for me, too," Daniel murmured, catching Jak watching him. "C'mon, Cody!" he said, in an artificially cheerful voice. "Dave's waiting." * * * "Hey, Rex!" Jak shouted, suddenly feeling better. "How'ya doing? . . . Yeah, I talked with her the other day. We don't have a lot t'say, but it's good to hear her voice and know things are okay with her. Say, is Dad around? "Oh? He's spending a lot of time at the gym. Anyone interesting turning up?" Jak laughed, as Rex described their father's gym exploits. "Yeah, Keith's doing great. Way better than I would have imagined. The guys have been great to him. It's almost as if he were one of the models. He didn't even have any trouble lounging around the pool naked a couple evenings ago. No . . . no one was having knock-me-down-and-fuck-me-silly sex. Is that what people your age are calling it now? "Yeah, everyone was kissing, n'stuff. Everyone pretty much has to save the sex stuff for work, in order to shoot lots." Jak barked a laugh. "Yeah, I know . . . you shoot lots all the time, but a couple of the guys are old men. They're twenty-one! Practically have one foot in the grave. They have to be stingy with how often they pop a load, or when it comes time for the big finale, they'll drool instead of do what the site's members want to see. "Yeah, I had a scene t'day with Ron. Yeah, that's the one; the blond. It was really hot. . . . Okay, okay, I was the bottom. I'm not the top all the time, y'know. He's a nice guy. We stood in the shower, afterward, for quite a while, and talked. . . . No . . . no fooling around. "Rex, don't you ever think about anything other than having sex? I mean, how do you make it through the day?" He laughed. "No, I wasn't asking how many times you shoot each day! And don't tell me you're a teenager and are always horny. I'm a teenager!" He paused, while Rex laughed. "I guess that wasn't a good comparison, huh? We're both pretty horny guys. Same's true of Dad, I bet. "No, Keith wasn't hanging around, while Ron and I were working, wondering what I was doing. One of the guys, Daniel, y'know, the cutie with the super-size dick, and the trademark baseball cap? Well, he wasn't working today, so he took Keith out to tour the city. They had a good time." Jak listened as Rex spoke. "What makes you think something's wrong? Geez, all I said was that they had a good time, and, no, I'm not getting snappy. . . . Yeah, so what of it? "I'm jealous, okay?" he said, raising his voice. "I'm jealous, and I hate feeling this way! Here I am, expecting Keith to accept what I do without a single complaint. I expect him to be okay with me kissing the guys as we all meet again. I expect him to have no trouble with me having sex with someone in the next room. "Yeah, I'm working, but I'm still getting fucked! And I expect him t'be okay with that. I'm expecting a fucking lot of him. "Then, he goes off, and has a good time with one of the guys, seeing a killer whale for pity's sake, and I get all bent out of shape! He and Daniel weren't fucking around, they were watching fish! What's wrong with me? Why should I think it's okay for there to be two sets of rules . . . one for him and another for me? "It's just, Daniel is so damn cute. He gave Keith a baseball cap with a big letter 'K' embroidered on the front! And Keith kissed him, telling him he had a good time! "And I feel like god damn shit! Neither one of 'em have done a friggin' thing wrong; yet, here I am wanting t'tell Daniel to keep his hands off my lover. "What's wrong with me? Daniel's a great guy. Why should a frickin' cap and a kiss on the cheek make me want to strangle someone?" Jak angrily sloshed through the water at the edge of the beach, holding his phone with one hand, and waving his free arm about as he spoke. "I thought the trip down here was going to be rough for Keith, and here I am, feeling awful, while he's having a good time, laughing and carrying on. "Yeah, I know I was having a good time, too. Ron's a hot man. "Huh? What do you mean? Of course Keith has the right to have a good time. I know that! That's not the problem! The friggin' problem is why do I hate it when he does?" Jak shouted, kicking at the sand and cursing it for making it difficult to walk. "No, I don't want to control him! "Yeah, I'm listening. . . . I am, too! " What is it you expect me to say? You think I'm happy only as long as Keith's feeling insecure, and I can be mister strong man, and that once he shows me he's able to not only stand on his own but have a good time doing it, that I get all insecure and start imagining him fooling around with everyone he smiles at?" Jak stopped, feeling as if he'd been slapped across the face, when his brother answered the rhetorical question with a simple, "Yes." He stopped his pacing and hung his head, as the reality of what he'd said hit him. "You're right. I felt the same way when Dad was gone and Keith was looking in on you." Jak pivoted and kicked, sending water and sand flying, his mind mired in a seething chaos. "Damn it, Rex! You're not supposed to be right all the time! It's not natural! If you knew that's what I was feeling, why didn't you friggin' say something? I mean someone's got'a tell me what I'm thinking. I sure don't have a clue! "Then, Dad had to go off to Detroit to sign those damn divorce papers and left you alone . . . with Keith. You're so god damned cute, and sexy, that I knew Keith wouldn't be with you two minutes and you'd have him in bed. "Yeah, I know it's not right for me to have made you the bad guy. That's what I was feeling though, and you're right. I didn't want to admit it to myself. All I knew is that you and Keith were going to be hanging around together and I knew, I knew you'd go after him! I mean, who wouldn't? He's just like you . . . sexy as all get-out. I'm surprised he doesn't have a line of guys a mile long following him around! The same's true of you." Once again, Jak hung his head, letting the small waves wash around his bare feet. "I'm sorry for not trusting you. "Yeah," he sighed. "You're right; I need to apologize to him, too. Geez, Rex. I feel rotten. "Are things gonna be okay between you n'me? . . . Y'see, I'm afraid of you, Rex! Yeah, well, maybe afraid isn't quite right, but I'm intimidated by you. You are everything I wish I was. I wish you'd hurry up and find a mega-serious boyfriend, or something," Jak grumbled, trying to lighten the mood. "Yeah, I love you, too . . . lots." This time, Jak's laugh was genuine. "No, I haven't asked Levi when you and Dad can come down for a visit. I'm dealing with Keith being down here, at the moment. I'll have to wait until I hear that there's going to be a big space of open time on Levi's schedule before I suggest the whole family be invited down. "Noooo, I don't think he'll want you to do an audition for him . . . at least not until the day you turn eighteen. "What? Since when have you made your own audition DVD's? Rex, you could get someone into massive trouble if the cops, or whomever, finds someone has a recording of you jerking off, or whatever. Tell me you haven't made lots of copies and passed 'em out to your friends . . . please. "Yeow!" Jak jumped, as someone touched his shoulder. He spun, nearly falling over as an incoming wave threatened to push him to his knees. " Keith! How long have you been standing there?" Keith reached for Jak's phone, taking it from his unresisting fingers. "Hi, Rex. Jak's gonna be busy for a while. He'll talk to you tomorrow. Bye." He swiped his finger across the screen, ending the call, and handed the phone back to Jak. "Now, that that's taken care of, let's get out of the water. I saw a bunch of sharks and things with stingers on 'em today, and I don't fancy meeting one of 'em up close and personal, especially in the dark." He took Jak's hand and led him toward the beach, sloshing through the foam. "Here I am, the first time I step in the frippin' ocean and it's at night!" he playfully groused. "I thought you were helping Levi with the dishes." "I was. We finished; then I came looking for you. You weren't hard to find, since you were yelling." "Oh." "Jak?" The tone of Keith's voice made him flinch. "Yes?" "I heard what you said about being jealous of Rex and me, or Daniel and me, and that you thought you were happy only when I was insecure . . ." "And, the moment you show me you can stand on your own without me giving you support, I get all bent out of shape," Jak concluded. "Yes." The moment of silence following Keith's one-word answer stretched unbearably. Finally, Jak blurted. "I . . . I . . . don't know what to say." "You can start by saying you're sorry, and take it from there. I've got no place to go, so don't hold back. You say you love me, yet you don't trust me t'be alone with another guy. How am I supposed to feel, hearing you say something like that?" There was another moment of silence, which threatened to lengthen. "I am sorry, Keith. I don't know if you can believe me, but, until I said that to Rex, I'd never been able to figure out exactly what I was feeling. Hearing myself say that was like a slap. I thought I was a better man than one t'feel that sort'a thing. I know neither you nor Rex deserve me to feel that way about either of you. The same's true of you and Daniel." "Okay, I accept your apology. Now, you have an inkling of the feelings I've been battling every time you come down here. Neither of us is perfect, Jak, but when we don't communicate what we're feeling with one another, we can make a bad situation worse. "You were aware of all my insecurities and how I was feeling about the guys, and you being down here. You did your best to build me up, telling me I was no different from the guys you work with. I eventually came to believe you, and, you know what? You were right. You gave me confidence to face my own insecurities, and to try and overcome them. Are you thinking that maybe, just maybe, you've convinced me too much?" Jak rubbed his temples, trying to think. "I dunno," he mumbled. "Yes, you do. Honesty, Jak. Be honest with me, but, even more important, be honest with yourself. You're capable of it, and I won't accept anything less from you, just as you should expect the same thing from me. "Do you somehow feel threatened by the fact that I came down here and am not cowering in some corner? Is that what you secretly hoped would happen, so you could come to the rescue? At the same time you were doing the rescuing, don't you think you'd be feeling somehow superior to me because you're the guy who reeks of confidence, and are the one everybody loves? Jak, maybe I'm be being too rough on you, but you need to really think of your motivations. Are you feeling threatened because I'm doing exactly the opposite of what you expected. It turns out, I'm not intimidated by everyone. I've been easily accepted by all of them, and . . . and are you most upset because I had a great time with Daniel, today?" Jak's mouth opened and closed. 'Honesty,' he told himself. "Some. I knew you could do fine, with all the guys; I just didn't know if they'd let you, or whatever. I was glad I was going to be around to help you out in case things got rough for you. I don't know if I was secretly hoping something would get rough or not, but I felt, with me around, you were in good hands. I could handle everything. Well . . . there was nothing to handle! You were standing on your own! I was glad to see how much you've grown, but, at the same time, I felt as if you didn't need me. And if you didn't need me, maybe you wouldn't want me." "Why? You thought I'd suddenly find Daniel, or one of the other guys, more desirable than you? Really, Jak, you're way smarter than that." "I hadn't actually had any of those thoughts. Until I blurted out to Rex how I was feeling, I didn't know how I was feeling . . . really. I knew I was feeling rotten, but I didn't know why. Deep down, I must have known what I was unconsciously thinking was wrong, but I wouldn't allow myself to know what was going on in my mind. "Like I said, I feel rotten, realizing what I was doing to you. I've thought I was a better person than that. I'm sorry. I really am. What more can I say?" he asked plaintively. Keith's voice softened, as he briefly touched Jak's shoulder, but was unwilling to offer unconditional comfort . . . yet. "I believe you. Now that you realize all these feelings are coming from some insecure place in you, the two of us can work on 'em, okay? That's what partners are for. You help me, and I do the same for you." "Thank you, Keith. I . . ." "Don't thank me yet. There's something else I need to say. It's about being honest with yourself. You've taken the first step, but there's another, maybe bigger one you need to face at the same time. I may be way off base, but I need to say what I'm feeling, and since we're out here on this deserted bit of sand, now's as good a time as any to say it. Please don't get angry. "Jak, as much as you profess wanting to be just another guy, there's some part of you, a small part, maybe, but a part, a growing part, which enjoys the adulation you're receiving. You need to be honest about those thoughts, just like you're being honest with yourself about how you've been unconsciously treating me. "There's nothing wrong with enjoying all the attention you're receiving, but I don't believe you're being honest with yourself about it, or about how your ego takes a hit on those couple times when someone recognizes you and asks for your autograph, then turns to me and asks for mine, sure that I must be someone important, too, just 'cause I'm with you. "That happened today, too. A guy approached Daniel, after we'd finished dinner, and asked him for his autograph, then asked me for mine. Daniel, just like you, told me to go ahead and sign, so I did. Afterward, though, I noticed a difference in how he acted, as opposed to you. I'm not saying how he acted is right, and how you act is wrong; only that I started thinking about how Daniel somehow seemed pleased someone would want my autograph, even when I'm a nobody, and how it seems you're not . . . pleased, whenever the same thing happens. It was like he sees the whole autograph-thing as some sort of game, while you've become serious about it. "I believe you when you tell me you love me. I know you do, by how you look at me, or how you touch me, but . . . now, here's the part you're not going to like . . . I think there's a piece of you that wants me to give you the same sort of adulation everyone else is. I won't do it, Jak. "I think you're the most wonderful guy I've ever met. I love you. I can't say how much I love you, often enough, but I am not going to worship you, or treat you like the guys who want your autograph do. "I've watched them and listened to them go on and on about you, and I've watched your reaction. I've seen your eyes when someone recognizes you and asks for an autograph. When I first met you, you really did believe you were just a regular guy. Now . . . you don't. At least a small part of you has come to believe what everyone's telling you, about how wonderful you are, and that's not a good thing. It's not a good thing for you. It's not a good thing for me, and it's not a good thing for us. "Now, before you say anything, you have to remember that I've said all this stuff precisely because I love you so deeply. If I didn't care for you, like you were my soul, I wouldn't bother to worry about how you behave. So . . . keep that in mind when you think all this stuff through, okay?" Jak nodded his bowed head. "Is what you just did . . . what some people would call a reality check?" "I don't know. Maybe." "Can you believe me when I tell you that, while I enjoy being popular on the website, and being recognized, and stuff, that I really don't want to become a guy who believes everything people say? I don't know how to handle it, though! All this has just sort'a swept over me! Like Dave said . . . it won't last. Someday, it'll be nothing more than a warm memory. I need to cultivate the really important things . . . you, Dad, Rex, Mom, Levi, and the guys. Like Dave said, those relationships are the things which will last. Those are the things which make life worth living." "Smart man, Dave." "Smart man, Keith." * * * Levi and Dave looked up, as Jak and Keith crossed the lawn, hand-in-hand. "Everything going okay, men?" Levi asked, raising a pitcher, clinking with the cool sound of ice cubes, silently asking if either man wanted something to drink. Both nodded, as they sat close to one another. "Yes, things are fine," Keith replied, raising the glass of pale orange liquid in a toast before sipping it and smiling at the taste. "I've been talking, and Jak's been listening. He let me get a few things off my chest . . ." "And we're both better men for it," Jak concluded, after sipping from his own frosty glass. "I've got a pretty smart lover, guys . . . in case you hadn't noticed." He fished his phone out of his pocket, as it chimed, indicating an incoming text, then smiled, as he quickly read the short message. "Excuse me; my brother, one of the other smart men in my life, is wanting to know if Keith fed me to the sharks, or if I've begged forgiveness." "The shark-thing was never an option," Keith said, in an aside, the corners of his lips quirking, as Jak stood and took a few steps away, to respond to his brother's message. "There was no need for him to beg for forgiveness, either. We just needed to get a few things out in the open, that's all. Now that we've gotten those things taken care of, we can move on." He did his best to stifle a yawn. "Sorry, guys. It's been a full day. Maybe we need to get back to the hotel." He looked at Jak, as he stepped closer and rested a hand on his shoulder, after sending his brother a message. "Rex told me I'm a lucky man to have him and you in my life." Keith laughed. "Sounds like Rex." "Smart young man, indeed," Levi murmured. "Now, about going back to the hotel. Why don't you both sleep in the guest room. We don't make videos there, in case you're wondering. It's where Dave's or my folks stay, whenever they come for a visit. Dave's had at least one drink too many to be driving you around town. I'm quite fond of him, as I am you both, so I'd rather you stay here, and be safe. We can throw your clothes in the laundry so they'll be fresh in the morning." "The man thinks we're not fresh," Keith mumbled, grinning at Dave. "I didn't want to say anything," Jak began. "I'm fresh. I've taken three showers today. You, on the other hand," "Have not been sloshing around in the salty ocean." "Sure you were. Remember the comments about avoiding sharks n'spiny stuff? That was just before you dragged me back to dry land." "Oh, yeah. We're both prob'ly in need of freshening up. Shall we get nekkid out here, or in the house?" "This is the shy man you mentioned?" Dave laughed, not aware of the slight tightening of Jak's lips. "I wasn't seeing the whole man, Dave. I've learned tonight that he, I, and us, are way more complicated than I ever realized."
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