welcome to crvboy - Nate's Wounded Heart

"I've seen the pics you sent mom to her e-mail and let me tell you that Luke guy you're shaking up with is kinda hot." She said with a chuckle.

"Dear god would you stop already? I'll send you a video of the two of us after we die ok?" He said.

"Yeah right, wait I think mom just got here I'll get her for ya." Ginny told him.

He waited a few seconds as he heard the phone move around. "How's my little brother doing?" Susie asked as soon as she got the phone from Ginny.

"Missing my girls, that's how I am." Nate told her.

"Aww, stop sweet talking me, how's Luke?" She asked smiling at the thought of Nate having a boyfriend, it had been months since he had called and told her about him and Luke and she still felt so happy that he had finally found a decent boyfriend.

"I'm gonna send him down there so the two of you can get your hands on him and you'll stop asking, jeez I shouldn't have sent you girls any pictures." He said teasing her.

"Well, I can sure as hell fix your room, or maybe he can sleep with me if you do send him." She said knowing the effect her words would have.

"Ewww, I don't think he likes twenty eight year old women so back off and stay away from my boyfriend." He answered in defeat.

"Ok, ok, maybe he can sleep with Ginny." She said nonchalantly.

"Oh dear lord, one of these days child services is going to find you I'm sure of that." He answered feeling butterflies in his stomach at the feeling of him and Susie joking around like they usually would, knowing that he was about to tell her something he was struggling to say because he didn't want to acknowledge it.

"Nate, honey what's wrong?" She asked.

"Oh, nothing why?" He said trying to dodge a bullet.

"You've been quiet for almost a minute, I know there is something wrong." She shot back, fearing what she thought could be coming.

"Ok, it's just that I've been thinking and it looks like..." He choked up before getting out.

"Looks like, you won't be coming down for Christmas." She said finishing his sentence.

He wanted to cry as soon as he heard her saying it. She knew him so well. "Yeah, I just don't have enough money, and I won't ask you for any, you have enough trouble with all that you pay like to be giving me money." He told her.

"And you even send me money from time to time..." She said fighting not to cry.

"Susie, don't start, you girls have needed that money and if spending Christmas away from home is what it takes to know that you two are fine then I'll just bear with it. Please don't feel bad about it, I won't stand it if you do, it already sucks as it is." He said feeling a tear fall from his right eye down his face.

She took a deep breath as she shook her head; she looked around her room and saw Ginny standing at the door. Ginny looked away as soon as Susie spotted her to try and hide the fact that she was crying, she had figured out what the whole phone call was about. "You know Natey, those rednecks don't know what they threw away when they kicked you out." Susie said smiling.

The tears started flowing freely. "I love you big sis." He said trying to calm down.

"Natey, in the last pictures you sent... are you eating well?" She asked in fear.

"Susie, come on, you know me better, money has been short, but not that much." He answered.

"Damn it, it's just a bus ride away, but I don't think I'd have the money to buy the tickets either..." She said before choking up.

"I know, I had stuff to pay here, you know my scholarship doesn't cover everything and money from the library isn't that much." He answered.

She stopped when she had an idea. "Hey, how about you visit Julian and Dylan?" She asked him.

"The twins? Wait, they live in Cape Girardeau don't they?" He asked back.

"Yeah, uncle John passed away a few months ago remember? Maybe they would like some company, why don't you call them and find out?" She asked him.

"Yeah uncle John... I dunno Susie I haven't seen them since they moved away, and that was over ten years ago." He answered.

"You and Julian love each other. I remember how cute the two of you were always playing together, and Dylan loved you too, just call them up and tell them." She told him.

"Well, I don't have any money and I don't want to show up like that and just eat their stuff and all..." He started saying.

"Nathaniel Thompson, you will call them and speak with Julian, if you want tell him that you're broke I don't care but do it. I know he won't care. Uncle John was always so cool and so were they, now stop arguing and do as I say!" She strongly said over the line.

"Jeez, ok woman easy, what are you on your PMS or something?" He answered loving the fact that he knew she was feeling a little better to be acting like that.

"Well call them and then let me know what happens." She said laughing.

"Ok, god this whole thing sucks." He said.

"Honey, no matter where you are, we love you and whether you're here or up there that won't change, and besides have you asked Luke if you could spend Christmas at his house? He said his parents love you." She told him.

"I know, but I don't want to get in the way, and I don't know I thought we could get together or something. His parents have been too good to me I just don't want to abuse their hospitality." He said.

"God you're such a fucking idiot." She said into the phone.

"MOM!" Ginny yelled from behind her.

"Young lady, you're barely eleven, don't push it, I'll let you use the big words after you turn fourteen." She said as loud as for Nate to hear it on the other side.

"Oh my god, poor Ginny is going to get white hair from dealing with you before she turns fourteen." He said laughing.

"Yeah, fuck you too babe. Now call them and let me know. And Natey, please consider spending Christmas with Luke. You love him and I know he loves you, don't worry so much please." She pleaded.

"Ok, I'll think about it, and sis, I love you and Ginny." He said.

"We love you too Natey. Now I'll get you the number for the twins, give me a sec." She said as she flipped through the pages of her address book. "Got it, it's five, five, five, seven, six, four, and two." She said.

"Ok, got it, now you girls be safe, tell Ginny I'll build a snowman with Luke if we get enough snow." He said smiling.

"She says you're a dick, and then ran as soon as she saw my evil glare. I'll get her later. Now call the twins, and take care honey." She answered.

"Right back at ya." She said before hanging up.

He took a deep breath, he hated this whole situation, but Susie was right, he should think about going to Luke's. Luke had already mentioned he could go if he wanted, but then again Luke still thought that Nate might go down to Austin and spend Christmas there. Also Susie was right on another subject. He missed Julian and Dylan. they had exchanged e-mails and pictures, Dylan had teased him a little in the years when he had been fat, but Julian never did.

Even though Julian and Dylan were twins, Julian had always been very fond of Nate, and if Julian and Dylan weren't together, Julian was playing and hanging out with Nate, but then they had moved... A little bit after Susie was kicked out, his uncle John had started arguing with his dad, and then Uncle John had decided to move. Nate and Julian had kept exchanging e-mails even after Nate had been kicked out, but then as they started getting busier with high school the e-mails began to diminish. He had been honest with Julian and Julian knew why he had unwillingly left his parents' house, and Julian had said he didn't care, Nate would always be his cousin and he'd always love him.

When he remembered that particular e-mail, all doubts left his mind and he dialed their number, after several rings he was about to hang up thinking no one was home. "Hello." He heard on the other side of the line.

"Natey?" Julian asked him.

"Yup." He said smiling.

"Man! It's been ages, how did you know it was me?" Julian asked him.

"I dunno I had a feeling." He said not really knowing how he had known it would be him.

"I've missed you cos..." Julian confessed, startling Nate by the quickness of the comment.

"I've missed you too Jules, and I'm sorry, you know I haven't been exactly supportive since..." He stopped not knowing how to go on.

"I know, and don't worry; you've had a lot of crap to deal with yourself, I haven't heard from you since you started college, how's it been cos?" He asked.

"It's been cool, Becca is here, and I met this cool guy that is the R.A. of our dorm, and then my roommate... well he and I..." He started to say.

"You guys are getting it on?" Julian asked him.

"Well, not exactly, we're like... a couple I guess." Nate said blushing.

"Yeah, it was about time, is he good with you? 'Cause if he tries to pull any crap on you like that S.O.B. Derek did I'll fucking kill him..." Julian started saying.

"No, no, no, he's cool, he's so good to me, and his parents are too, don't worry about that." Nate told him, loving how protective he got all of a sudden.

"Well, now that I remember, you are in St. Louis aren't you?" Julian asked him.

"Yeah, and I was about to ask you if I could visit you guys or something." Nate said.

"Or something? Get your butt down here and don't ask. I'll tell Dylan, how about this Friday night or Saturday? Do you have much to do on Fridays?" Julian asked him.

"No, actually I'll just do my Friday hours on Thursday and that way I won't have to work at the library on Friday and I'll be able to go. Of course I will have to ask Luke to go with me, but his Fridays are light... Jules, is there any problem with him going down there with me?" He asked when he realized about it.

"Of course not, Dylan knows, about... you know, and he doesn't care, neither did Dad, ever, you check with Luke and if everything is cool then let me know and we'll be waiting for you guys on Friday evening, if you get on your way after lunch you'll probably be here before it gets dark." He said.

"Ok, but first there is some stuff I wanted to talk to you too. Christmas break is coming and I don't think I'm going to be able to go down to Austin and spend it with Susie and Ginny." He said.

"That sucks Natey, are you going to spend it with... I take it Luke is your boyfriend, right?" He asked.

"Yeah, sorry Luke is my roommate and boyfriend. I don't know we've gone to his parents' place in Columbia several times in the last month and a half but I don't feel right about sneaking in just like that." Nate told him.

"Well you said his parents are cool, so I don't get it. Wait, do you want to know if you can spend Christmas with us?" Julian asked.

"Damn you're still as quick as I remember. Yeah, I was going to ask you, but you have to know that I am literally broke at the moment..." He started saying.

"Nate, come on, I don't care, you're my cousin, you're Natey, if you want you can just come down here and you don't have to worry about money or anything, I'll fill Dylan in about it." He said.

"Ok, but still I would like to visit before then. I still have two weeks before Christmas break, you think you can stand seeing my ugly mug?" He asked.

"Heh, just get your butt down here this weekend and shut up already, I'll tell Dylan about it, by the way this number you are calling from, is it your room number?" He asked Nate.

"No, the dorm doesn't have a phone, Luke let me use his cell." He said.

"So, I'll save the number and I'll talk to Dylan a little when he gets here from practice and then if you don't call me like... tomorrow, I'll call this number, ok?" He asked.

"Practice, Dyl is still playing football?" Nate asked him.

"Yeah, sometimes I beg for someone to shoot him. Not really, but he gets kind of annoying at times." Julian confessed.

"Are you two still identical?" Nate asked him.

"Yup, I don't do sports but I do have the same definition and built he has, and we've got the same height and weight, I work out on my own, but I still am the nerdy one." Julian said chuckling.

"That's my Jules, I'll go find Luke and then I'll call you."

"Ok, and Natey, don't be a stranger man. Your parents are idiots, but we love you dude." Julian told him.

"I love you too cos, and I'm sorry for not calling more often." Nate said before hanging up.

"So, do they look like you?" Martin asked him.

"Well, yeah, though they were slimmer. Back then I was all chubby..." Nate confessed.

"How hot are they?" Brent asked Becca.

"How would I know, I've only seen pics of when they were kids. They moved away like a month before I moved in." She answered.

"Damn, Nate isn't really sharing many details about them." Martin said.

"You bitches just wanna know 'cause they're twins, now leave my boy alone." Luke said pointing his finger at them.

"I will not tell you, so stop perving on my cousins already." Nate said as he finished his lunch.

"Let's go get our stuff and get on the road already." Luke told him as he got up and went to dispose of his tray.

"Would you take pics of them for me?" Brent asked pouting.

"No, and besides you have Martin. That's enough dick and horniness to keep you busy until we get back." Nate said as he got up.

"I will get pics right?" Becca asked him.

"Yup, 'cause you're a good girl, but you'll only get them if you start dating." He answered.

"Dude this guys must be something special. What are they? Brad Pitt look a likes or something?" Martin asked.

Luke got back just as Nate went to return his tray. "Keep asking and you'll never find out." Nate said as he walked away with Luke.

"Is that the house?" Luke asked hours later as they were driving slowly looking for the house of the address Julian had given Nate.

Nate looked at the house that Luke had asked him about. He saw a man with dark hair and olive skin sitting at the doorway of the house, and he recognized Julian. "Yup, that's Jules alright." He said.

Luke parked in front of the house and he saw the guy get up from the doorway and walk down to the sidewalk. He was shocked to see how much Julian looked like Nate. He was just as tall and had the same broad shoulders and complexion Nate had, though Julian's face looked somehow softer in comparison to Nate's strong facial features. They still had the same high cheekbones. "Dude, now I know why you didn't want to say how they looked. He could pass for your brother." Luke said as Nate started to get out of the car.

"Natey man, have you grown!" Julian said, as he grabbed Nate and locked him into a hug.

"Like you didn't grow, man you're as tall as I am." Nate said as he embraced Julian.

"God I've missed you." Julian whispered as he hugged Nate with his eyes closed.

"I've missed you too, Jules." Nate said, then they heard a click and saw a flash, they looked to their right and saw Luke grinning at them, while he held his cell phone up after taking a picture of them with its camera.

"Sorry, you guys looked so cute I had to do it." He said smiling at them.

"So, you're Natey's guy huh?" Julian said breaking the hug, and offering his left hand for Luke to hold.

"Yup, dude, you two could pass for brothers." Luke said as he shook Julian's hand.

"Well, our eyes are different, check it." Julian told him.

Luke leaned forward and looked into Julian's eyes and realized his eyes were sort of hazel, though they looked more like a yellowish brown. They were of a very beautiful shiny color, just like Nate's caramel brown shiny eyes. "Yup, cool eyes too." Luke told him.

"Well, let's go in, Dylan will be her in half an hour or so, and dinner is almost ready." Julian said as they went up the stairs to the house.

"You didn't have to cook for us..." Nate started to say.

"Is he like this all the time?" Julian asked Luke.

"Sometimes, though I know how to shut him up pretty nice." Luke said grinning.

Nate stared at him in disbelief as Julian laughed and stepped inside. "He used to be more laid back when we were kids. I hope you can get it out of his system." Julian said.

"Hello, I'm standing right here" Nate said waving his hand at the two of them.

"Yeah, sorry, I just missed teasing ya like this." Julian said as he looked Nate up and down. "Damn Natey, you've sure slimmed down a lot." He said.

Nate blushed. "What can I say, Luke keeps me active." He said smiling.

"Now that's better." Julian said laughing.

"Damn, Julian you're going home with us. He doesn't usually tease me back like that, besides having you home would be good for torturing Brent and Martin." Luke said smiling.

"Who are they, your other friends?" Julian asked.

"Yeah, Martin's our R.A. and my cousin, and Brent is his boyfriend..."Luke said and realized besides from admitting he was Nate's boyfriend he still didn't know how cool he actually was with the whole gay subject.

"Ok, so, just so we're clear, I am sort of gay too..." Julian told them and then got them both to stare in amazement at his words.

"Why didn't you ever say something?" Nate asked him.

"Well, I didn't really come to terms with the whole thing until dad got sick and all..." Julian answered.

"Did Uncle John know?" Nate asked him.

"Yeah, I told him, I hadn't said anything before because I think I was afraid, I mean when your parents kicked you out he was furious and he kept saying that it should never matter what was a kid's orientation, his or her parents should just deal with it. So I started thinking maybe he would be cool with it, but still I was afraid and then, they discovered his cancer, and in 2 months he was gone, so halfway through the disease I told him..." Julian said.

It was the first time Nate had heard Julian talk about his father's disease. "I'm sorry Jules, Uncle John was always the best... wait, what does Dylan think?" He asked.

"Well, after I told dad, he asked me one day during lunch, 'When are you gonna bring a boy home?' And Dylan said it was about damn time I'd date any guy, so I asked him what he meant and he said he'd always known I'm gay." Julian said.

Luke started laughing. "Nice family." He said and got Julian and Nate laughing.

"And is Dylan...?" He was about to ask.

"Well, he goes through girls like a knife through butter but he's said a few times that he has actually thought about finding out what sex with a guy is like." Julian said. "But, I probably shouldn't have said that, so pretend like you don't know." He added blushing.

"Oh, yeah, you blush just like him, you are related." Luke said shaking his head.

Just then as they were laughing they heard the front door open, and then a perfect copy of Julian walked in, though unlike Julian who was wearing some loose blue jeans and a loose black long sleeved shirt. Dylan was wearing tight football shorts and a tight wife beater, his hard biceps and chest were very easy to notice, and adding the same olive skin that Julian had to his sweaty look, made Dylan look like your classic stud. He stopped in front of them and smiled showing some slight dimples, that resembled to the ones both Nate and Julian had.

"Natey! Damn I always thought we'd be taller than you, come here man!" Dylan said raching out and hugging Nate, Nate returned the hug and Dylan squeezed him hard.

"Damn, let me breathe little cous..." Nate said chuckling and Dylan loosened his grip on him.

"Sorry, I tend to forget about that, hey is this your boyfriend?" He asked as he turned his sight to Luke.

"Yup, that's Luke." Nate said smiling as Dylan let go off him and reached out offering his right hand to shake.

"Pleasure to meet you, little cousin?" Luke asked.

"Yeah, this fucktards always call me little 'cause Julian's older by five minutes." He said shaking Luke's hand with a strong grip.

"Wait, you're the kind of twins that are mirror images, or something, right?" Luke asked them.

"How did you realize?" Dylan asked him.

"I bet it was the hand shake." Julian said.

"Yup, Julian gave me his left and you gave me your right, so one is left-handed and the other the opposite, right?" Luke asked.

"Yeah, he's the lefty." Dylan said as he scratched his neck and then he sniffed his arm pit. "Damn I need a shower... I'll join you guys in a while." Dylan said as he dashed to the stairs and up to the second floor.

"Damn, that boy's hawt..." Luke said biting on his lower lip.

"Hey!" Nate said before smacking him in the back of the head.

Julian laughed at them. "He's very easy going, and sometimes I think he doesn't realize how attractive he is to other people's eyes." He told them.

"And he's got the same eye color you have." Luke observed.

"Yeah, they sure have nice eyes." Nate added.

"Ok, I'm going to start serving dinner, so you guys go put your stuff in the guest room. It's the third door to the left down the hall upstairs. I'll set the table while Dylan showers, so go clean up and join us." Julian told them.

"Ok, we'll be right down Jules." Nate said as he grabbed his back pack and started going up the stairs with Luke behind him.

They found the room and left their stuff sitting on the bed. It was a large queen size bed, enough for the two of them, and they kissed a little before Luke chuckled. "God, it's good we didn't bring Martin and Brent along." He said.

"Well, they're gonna end up meeting them at some point." Nate said.

"You're gonna keep on visiting from now on, huh?" Luke said.

"Oh yeah, I missed them. Just with seeing them for a few minutes I don't want to leave... anyways let's go downstairs and wash up." Nate said as he went to the door, as they walked back towards the stairs they saw the door in the room next to theirs open and out came Dylan with just a towel wrapped around his waist. The boy was all muscle you could say, tight pectorals, big biceps, slightly hairy arms, hairy hard legs, with quite some strong thigh muscles, a dark thick treasure trail that went up to his navel and a dark patch of hair at the center of his chest.

"Hey guys, whatever Julian cooked it smells good. I'm gonna be down there soon, I'll just get the stinky smell off me and I'll join ya." Dylan said as he went in the bathroom across the hall from his room and closed the door.

"Oh boy, I sure hope you brought condoms and lube 'cause I sure am getting hornier by the minute." Luke said biting on his lower lip.

"Stop perving over my cousins! I should've listened to Martin and gotten you neutered a while ago..." Nate said with a scowl as he dragged Luke downstairs.