Mary had planned on only staying through Friday with Dave, but he convinced her to stay through the weekend. He told her that he might have a big surprise for her if everything went according to his plan.

The boys had no objections. They loved the roof top garden and especially the pool. Dave and Mary spent the morning catching up further on their lives. At noon they met Joe at Fine's Deli for lunch. Max bellyached about not going back to Gio's. He not only loved the food; he was entranced by the young Italian chef.

Mary couldn't help but hear Joe ask Dave if he'd heard anything yet. And asked him what he was waiting to hear. Dave sloughed it off as nothing important, saying it was just a business deal he was involved in. Mary thought no more about it.

A few minutes later Dave's cell started playing "O Solo Mio."

"An Italian telephone, Dave?" Mary asked.

"A gift from a friend."

Mary grinned, noting that he glared at Joe before he moved away from the table to take the call.

It was Clyde. "Dave, sorry to interrupt your lunch. I got the go ahead from the Hospital Administrator. Gary has an appointment next Wednesday morning with the specialists at CHOC."

"Yes." Dave shouted.

Joe, who was watching Dave intently, shot his fist into the air. Mary looked inquiringly at him. He grinned and held up a hand to stop her question.

Clyde ignored Dave's exuberant outburst and continued. "Your sister will need a place to stay while there. I took the liberty of reserving a suite at Hotel America in Anaheim for her. Also, I have reserved a rental car for her that will be waiting at John Wayne Airport. Her plane reservations are for Tuesday morning on United. Is there anything else I missed?"

"Damn, Clyde, you're becoming indispensable. I can't think of a thing at the moment."

"Like the saying goes, you get what you pay for. And in your case, you pay for what you get," Clyde chuckled.

"Well, you're proving to be worth every cent, Clyde. Thanks, and good afternoon."

Dave walked back to the table all smiles.

"What's the good word, Dave?" Joe asked.

"It's a go all the way." He turned to Mary. "I hate to see you leave so soon after coming back into my life, Sis, but...." He hesitated. Mary looked startled and then concerned. "But," Dave continued, "you have an appointment with Gary in Orange, California next Wednesday morning."

"What?" Mary squawked. She grabbed her brother around the neck nearly choking him. The lunch crowd all craned to see what the excitement was about. David and Max both hugged their little brother.

Lloyd's day dragged.... he puttered around the house doing little odd jobs that he'd never taken the time to do. He couldn't get the image of Dave out of his mind. Mid-afternoon he collapsed into his recliner to watch a movie on the tube swearing he wouldn't fall asleep. But being exhausted, he was soon dozing.

Bill was scolding him about the way he treated Dave. Lloyd didn't want to hear the words, but they came anyway and he wept in his sleep. He awoke muttering, "I'm so sorry Dave. I'm so sorry." He turned off the TV and stared at the ceiling. He managed all these years to block out the event Bill was scolding him about. He was overcome with a monumental guilt. He wept remembering what he had done. The phone rang and he ignored it. He lay in the recliner until time for his appointment with the counselor.

At seven he was back at Dr. Townsend's office. When the Doctor opened the door for Lloyd he raised an eyebrow, but made no comment about how he looked. He motioned for him to sit down. "Would you like a Coke?" Lloyd nodded and mumbled a 'thanks'. The doctor handed him a can and sat in the high backed wing chair opposite Lloyd. "Trouble sleeping?" he asked.

"Yeah, I miss my wife. And I keep having these dreams."

"You want to tell me about them?"

"I guess I should. Until I deal with this problem, it seems they're not going to go away."

Lloyd described in detail the first dream. The doctor's response was a simple "Hmm. The second dream was the same?"

"More or less, but in the third one they were all pointing at me and hissing."

"What do you think the hissing means?"

"I think it was just the sound of the TV insinuating its self into the dream."

"You don't think there was anymore significance than that?"

"Of course, there was," Lloyd snapped in aggravation.

The doctor waited. Lloyd just glared out the dark window, his thoughts in turmoil.

"Well?" the doctor quietly asked.

The word whipped through Lloyd's thoughts, dragging him back to the moment. He glanced at the doctor and then down. "I need to tell you the dream I had this afternoon."

When he finished he looked at the doctor for comment. The doctor chewed his lower lip for a moment as he studied Lloyd.

"Describe Dave for me."

"Dave?"

"Yes. Describe how you perceive him as a man."

"Well, he's about five foot eight with light brown hair and brown eyes."

"No, no, not a physical description. How do you see Dave in your mind."

Lloyd flushed. He looked at the floor for a moment and than laid back into the wing chair and closed his eyes.

"Dave is the most handsome man I've ever seen. When I look at him my heart hurts. He's kind and gentle. He's very loving. He's probably the most considerate man I've ever met.

"He could have said something to Mary that would probably have ended our marriage, but he has said nothing and kept his distance. I believe he even insisted that his mother say nothing to Mary about my treatment of him."

"Do you love him, Lloyd?"

Lloyd sat up and glared at the doctor.

"What the hell kind of question is that? I'm a man for Christ Sake. I have a wife and three sons."

Dr. Townsend's expression didn't change. "Do you love him?" he repeated.

Lloyd stared at him for a few moments then covered his face. His body shook as he began to weep. "Yes. Yes, God Dammit. I love him."

The doctor let him cry it out. Lloyd finally sat back with a final hard shudder. He looked at the doctor.

"Yes, I love Dave. That's why I can't be around him. That's why I verbally abuse him whenever I'm alone with him. Just looking at him I feel dirty. I was willingly ready to give up my wife and son if he would love me in return."

"And you told Dave this?"

"Yes, I told him."

"And his response was?"

"The same as in the dream except that he held me. He explained that I had a responsibility to Mary and my new born son. He said he loved me too, but that he was in love with his partner Bill and that sharing our love could never be. It was the same as in the dream."

"How did you feel about that? How did you react?"

"It made me feel like a real low life. I was spurned. I reacted badly. I told him to keep his queer ass away from me and my family. I made it his fault that I felt like I did." Lloyd paused in thought and then added, ".....like I do. Dave is a good man. He didn't deserve to be treated like that. But he seemed to understand where I was coming from and after that the only times we've ever seen each other is in the company of my mother-in-law and Mary."

Lloyd laid back into the chair, his head wedged against the wing. He closed his eyes and breathed deeply. He shuddered every once in a while. He hadn't bothered to wipe the tears that streaked his face. The doctor sat and watched him. Lloyd had just been through a catharsis that would probably change his whole out look. After a few minutes when he had finally calmed down, the doctor called softly, "Lloyd."

Lloyd opened his eyes.

"How do you feel now?"

He closed his eyes. It was almost a minute before he answered. He finally leaned forward, rested his elbows on his knees, clasped his hands together and studied the floor as he spoke. "I feel cleaner than I've felt in a very long time. I feel that I now need to seek forgiveness, not only from Dave for treating him like I have, but from Mary and my boys, too. Mary is right, for all these years I deprived her of her brother and my boys of a loving uncle. I hope they can all find it in their hearts to forgive me."

"Do you think you can forgive yourself?"

Lloyd sat up and looked the doctor in the eye. "Not right now, Doc. Not until I have rectified the damage I've done to the people I love. Maybe then.... but not right now."

He went back to staring at the floor. Doctor Townsend studied him for several seconds before speaking.

"I don't think I've ever had a patient that was as openly honest with himself as you have been. To be honest with you, Lloyd, I thought that it would take months to get to this point. I don't think that there's anything further that I can do for you. I hope you'll come back in a month's time and fill me in on how your life has progressed.

"Sure, Doc. Thanks for your help."

When Lloyd got home it was nearly eleven. He had to talk to Mary even if it woke the whole house.

Dave answered.

"Hello, Dave, This is Lloyd."

"How are you, Lloyd?"

He could hear the concern in Dave's voice. He knew he was asking more than what those three little words meant. "I'm going to be okay. I need to speak to your sister, please."

"Of course. Let me go call her."

Dave got up, put on a robe and padded out to the guest room. He tapped on the door. "Mary, Lloyd is on the phone. I'll hang up my end when you pick up."

Dave dropped the robe and scooted back up against Joe, who wrapped him snugly against his chest. "I think he's going to be okay."

"What makes you think that?"

"He referred to Mary as my sister, not his wife."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah, think about the significance of that."

"You're saying that he's coming around to accepting you being gay?"

"That's never been the problem, Joe, even though he made it seem so. I think he's finally accepting his own feelings and taking responsibility for them."

"I don't understand."

"I'll tell you the whole story tomorrow after Mary leaves."

At that moment there was a light tapping on the door.

"Come on in, Sis."

Mary opened the door and stepped into the room. Dave was still snuggled up against Joe. Joe had an arm wrapped around his chest. She raised her eyebrows. "I've never thought about you two in bed. You look so natural, so right. You're beautiful together."

Both men smiled at her. Dave patted the bed. Mary moved to sit on the edge of it. "So how is Lloyd?" he asked.

"He's going to be just fine. You'll probably be hearing from him in a day or so."

"That would be so nice."

"You know he really is a good man, a wonderful husband and father."

"I've always loved him, you know that, Mary."

Mary took Dave's hand in both of hers.

"I love you, little brother. You've been so patient with him."

"I knew he'd come around someday."

"Well, you two need to make up for lost time, but...." she sighed and left the thought unsaid. She smiled at the two men. "I've a long drive in the morning. You two rest well." With a pat on Dave's knee, she rose and left the room.

"She's a sweet lady. Kinda like her brother."

"I love you, too, Joe. Good night, Big Guy"

He turned off the lamp and wiggled a little closer.