John

After our ride to Gilroy, Monday and Tuesday flew by for me. We were doing a rewire in a forties house over in North Beach when I got a call from Farr around ten Wednesday morning. I knew when I saw his name on the caller ID that something bad had happened.

"Mom's had a reversal. She's in intensive care, and she's going to be operated on. I've got to go home," he said, without a greeting.

"Wait for me. I'll drive you down."

"I can get there faster if I go on my bike."

"Yeah, and the way you sound, you'd probably not make it. I'll be over to pick you up in half an hour. Be packed and ready." I closed the phone before he could object. I quickly turned the job over to Ward, telling him not to plan on seeing me until Monday. I'd call him later.

Twenty-three minutes later, I pulled up to Farr's house. Don't ask me how I got home, packed some clothes and shaving gear and got to his house that fast. He was sitting on his front stoop petting Spike, but when he saw me, he jumped up, dumping the cat and was at the curb as I stopped.

"Thanks, John," he said, as he tossed his knap sack into the back, climbed in and fastened his seatbelt.

"Anything for you, Babe."

I thanked God that the south bound traffic was light. Even going through San Jose, we hit hardly any slow up. I kept my speed at an even 75 most of the way.

I let Farr out at the hospital entrance, and then parked my truck. He'd said he'd meet me in the waiting room. Forty-five minutes later, I was bouncing off the walls of the sterile waiting room that I'd found right off the main entrance on the ground floor. A man walked in, who looked familiar, but I knew I'd never seen him before.

"John?" he asked.

I stopped in mid pace. "Yes. I'm John."

He held out his hand. "I'm Will, Frank's youngest brother."

Will's hair was golden brown like his dad's, not black like Farr's and his other two brothers' that I'd met. His eyes were fascinating. Unlike Farr's blue eyes, Will's were an intense slate. The thought that he could easily hypnotize with them crossed my mind.

"How is your mom doing?" I asked, as I took his hand.

He shook his head and his eyes darkened. "They don't think she'll make it."

My legs gave out... and I sat down. It wasn't right that my hateful, self-righteous, religion possessed mother was alive and promulgating her form of hate in the name of Christianity, while this loving woman was dying. "She's such a sweet lady," I muttered.

"You've met her?"

I nodded. "Yeah, last weekend."

"I wish I'd gotten here. I let my class obligations be more important."

I knew nearly nothing about Farr's brothers. I knew that Will lived in Berkley; and that his other brother, Patrick, was a lawyer, married and living in Santa Barbara. Of course, I'd met Dan and Pete, who were farmers along with his dad.

"You teach school?" I asked.

Will chuckled. "I guess Frank is still as close mouthed as ever. Yeah, I'm a teacher. I teach English Literature at Berkley."

I just nodded, not knowing what to say. I was saved by a beautiful, auburn-haired, young woman pausing at the door before walking in and wrapping an arm around Will's waist.

"I thought I heard your voice," she said. "So, how is Alice doing?"

Will wrapped himself about her, and just shook his head.

"Oh, God, no," she muttered.

She held him for a bit, while he pulled himself back together. Eventually, he straightened up, pulled a handkerchief from his back pocket, wiped his eyes and said. "Reese, this is John, Frank's partner."

That bowled me over....Frank's partner. Wow, I hadn't thought of myself that way.

"John, this beautiful, wonderful lady is Reese, my fiancée."

She held out her hand and said, "John, I'd heard a rumor that Frank had found his man." She looked me up and down with her green eyes sparkling. 'An Irish lass,' I thought. "He really did," she said. "It's wonderful to meet you."

"Thanks. It's a pleasure meeting you." I took her hand in my palm and gently pressed the back of it with my thumb.

She looked at our clasped hands, then up at me. "You've been around the Navajo."

"No, my mother's best friend was from the reservation. She taught me."

"What are you talking about?" Will asked.

"Show him," Reese said.

I took Will's hand, and did the same as I had done to Reese's. "This is how I was taught to shake a lady's hand."

"Nice - gentle. I'll have to remember that," Will said.

"How is Frank holding up?" Reese asked me.

I shrugged. "I haven't seen him since we got here. He said he'd meet me here in the waiting room, but he hasn't shown up. Besides, here, I'm out of the way."

"John, I'm sure he meant the waiting room up in intensive care. You have as much right to be beside Frank as Reese or Janet, Tom's wife, has to be with us," Will said. "You're part of this family."

"Thanks, Will," I muttered.

I wondered if he realized how much his acceptance meant to me, but before I could tell him, Reese asked, "Has Patrick and Janet arrived yet?"

Will shook his head. "Patrick was in court when Dan called them. They won't be here until about four. Let's go join the rest of the family."

Reese took my arm and pulled me out of the chair that I'd sat back onto. "Come on, John."

On entering the intensive care waiting room, I immediately noticed that this room was set up for the comfort of those that needed to use it. There was even a water dispenser and coffee server in the corner. Farr was sitting with his head in his hands next to his dad, with his dad's arm around his shoulders. Dan and Pete sat close together in a couple of club chairs, their forearms pressed together where they rested on the chair arms. They both silently rose to greet me with a hug.

Dad, as he'd instructed me to call him, stood up and hugged and kissed Reese on the cheek. He, then, turned and hugged me. "I'm glad Will found you, Son. Your little man needs you."

Farr raised his head when he heard Dad and smiled at me. His eyes were red and puffy. Dad motioned for me to sit where he had been sitting. Farr immediately leaned against me, and gave me a kiss on the cheek. While his dad and brothers ignored it, I noticed that Reese smiled. It made me feel that Will's words were true. I was part of this family.

Frank

I obviously wasn't thinking straight when we arrived at the hospital. I'd told John that I'd see him in the waiting room when he let me out, before parking his truck. I inquired about my mom, and was directed to the intensive care ward where I found Dad and three of my brothers. When John didn't show up, I was kind of feeling like he didn't want to be a part of my family. Thankfully, Will had the presence of mind, after I'd told them that John had driven me down, to ask where he was. He went to find him, and ended up returning with his fiancée, as well as John.

I fell apart inside when I heard what Dad said to John as he hugged him. I didn't outwardly show it, but it really moved me to hear Dad tell John that I needed him. Hearing that, was like his showing me his total acceptance. I think that I'd always harbored a tiny doubt about Dad's acceptance of me being gay... obviously with no reason.

John sat beside me and I melted against him. I glanced at Dan. He and Pete were sitting side by side in two club chairs, their elbows and forearms touching. They smiled at me. I smiled back, and looked at Will, who winked at me and said something to Reese, who smiled at me, too. Dad had sat back down on my other side and had a comforting grip on my knee. I let go of John for a moment, and hugged Dad as tightly as I could.

Nobody was saying anything; there was really nothing at the moment that needed saying. We just waited... and waited... and waited. I wondered why some sadistic bastard had put the big clock over the door. It torturously ticked away the seconds of our suspended lives.

It was three twenty-seven when the surgeon appeared in the doorway. I knew immediately, by his defeated demeanor, that Mom was gone. John's grip on me tightened when the doctor said, "I'm sorry, we couldn't stop the hemorrhaging. She didn't make it." I heard Reese sob, and Dad let out a sad sigh before standing and saying "Thanks" to the surgeon.

A nurse led us to a room where they'd placed Mom in a bed as though she was sleeping. She looked tired, exhausted. We each, including Reese and John, kissed her cheek and said our good-byes. The tears in John's eyes just strengthened my love for the big man.

Dan accompanied Dad to make the funeral arrangements. Will and Reese said they'd wait for Tom and Janet to arrive from Santa Barbara, while John and I followed Pete across the valley and up the hill to their large rambling ranch-style house. He showed us to a bedroom and suggested we make ourselves at home, and get some rest. He excused himself to go make some phone calls.

John

When Pete left us in the guest bedroom, Farr walked over to the sliding glass door that looked out into a well groomed garden and across the valley. He leaned against the jam and sighed. I stood in the middle of the room feeling helpless and just watched him, until I saw his shoulders shaking. I went to him and took him in my arms. He collapsed against me as he cried.

I picked him up and carried him to the bed, where I stripped off his clothes, folded back the covers and laid him on the clean fresh sheet. Quickly, I removed my own clothes, crawled in with him, and pulled him up against me. He buried his face in my chest hair and sobbed himself to sleep while I just held him and caressed his back, occasionally kissing the top of his head.

I must have fallen asleep, too. I woke to find that Farr had turned over and snuggled his back up against me. I heard tapping on the sliding glass door and raised my head to see Reese outside. I was thankful that Farr, at some point, had pulled the top sheet up to cover us. I motioned for her to come in.

Quietly, she slid the door open and stepped through, sat on the edge of the bed and ran her fingers though Farr's hair.

"How is he doing?" she asked in a whisper.

"He's okay now," I whispered back.

"I can't help but want to cuddle him," she said.

I couldn't help but grin. "That's one of my favorite pastimes."

"He's so precious," she said, as she caressed his cheek.

"And I'm awake," Farr mumbled against my arm, which lay under his head.

Reese brushed the hair away from his face and kissed his forehead. "Are you going to be all right, Little Brother?"

Farr nodded and said, "Yeah, I'll be okay. I just wish my knuckleheaded brother would hurry up and marry you, so I can tell you that you're my favorite sister-in-law."

"I heard that," Will said, entering through the sliding glass door. "I'll have you know, Brat, the date has been set."

Farr sat up. I watched Reese glance at his muscular, hairy chest and raise her eyebrows. She apparently had thought of Farr as looking like a little boy, and was surprised to see that he had a grown man's body.

"Congratulations!" Farr said, and hugged his blushing future sister-in-law. I had a feeling that her blush was from having a nearly naked man hugging her.

Will noticed, too, and said, "If you're going to manhandle my woman, Frank, at least get dressed first."

Farr blushed furiously, grabbed the sheet and pulled it up around his neck. "Forgive me, Reese, I forgot I wasn't clothed."

Reese laughed, still blushing as she got up and put an arm around Will's waist. "Nothing to forgive, Frank, and I assure you, the pleasure was all mine." She gave him a coquettish smile and winked.

Will glared at her. "Would you behave? That's my baby brother you're flirting with."

Reese laughed again. "So? He's twenty-six, and he's in bed with his husband."

Farr twisted around to look at me. "I thought you were the wife," he said, sounding incredulous.

It was wonderful that Farr was feeling good enough to joke, even if it was at my expense. Still, I could feel the blood rushing to my face; I had to say something, so I said, "I'm not your husband, and I'm not your wife, but if you'll have me, Farr, I'll be your mate for life."

Farr stared at me with an ogling look. I could feel Reese and Will staring open-mouthed at me, too. I kept my eyes on Farr. His eyes filled with tears. "I'll have you, John... mates for life."

Will cleared his throat. "Come on, Love, let's give them some privacy." He pulled the drapes closed, then held them back for Reese to step out the slider. He followed her and slid the door closed as Farr turned in my arms seeking my lips. It took me a moment to get myself into gear, as I realized that I'd just proposed to Farr and he'd accepted. And Reese and Will had witnessed it... Wow.

I sometimes wonder if the connection between my brain and mouth has a short in it. Several times in the last month or so, I've started to ask Farr to commit to a lifetime with me, but I just couldn't get the words out. Then without thinking about it, I just blurted it out, and on top of it all, the words came out rhyming. Yeah, there's got to be a short circuit in my head.