Jason lay on his side while thinking about last night. After making love they had decided to sleep together, but after Pete had rolled in his sleep and hit him in the chest with his cast, Jason decided to move into his a different room to sleep. His head was still reeling. Making love to Pete had turned out to be a hundred times better than his imagination, even with that damned cast. At first Jason had been a little intimidated by Pete's size, but once he discovered that it fit into his mouth, he did his best to swallow the whole length. He hadn't succeeded, but Pete had loved what he'd done anyway. As he thought about it he figured all those dumb stories on Nifty were just exaggerations. Well, he'd keep trying anyway, maybe he could succeed. Then he thought about having ridden Pete's big phallus and squeezed his sore rectum. The feeling and the memory made him horny, but he knew Pete needed his rest if he was going to heal and get that damned cast off. He thought about just jerking off and decided to save it for Pete... later. It had been awkward, but feeding Pete his hard cock and ejaculating in his mouth had been almost as wonderful as riding him.
He glanced at the clock. Jim wasn't due to show up for another hour and a half, and now at 4:30 a.m. Jason was awake. Not being one who liked lounging in bed after waking, he slipped from between the covers and headed for the bathroom. Finished in there, he wandered into the kitchen and turned on the light.
On opening the fridge, he discovered it had been fully stocked. He wondered if it had been Dave or Jim who had done it. After months of living in the dorm, it was so cool to just open the fridge and pour himself a cold glass of orange juice. At five foot three he had to pull a chair over to the cupboard to get a glass from the third shelf up. He noted that he'd have to rearrange the shelves with the glasses on the lowest shelf.
It was getting light outside. Jason flipped the lights off and looked out at the back yard. It looked like Dave loved to garden, for sure he loved flowers. Jason noted a rose garden with a cutting garden behind it. Since Jason loved gardening, too, he'd have to check it out later.
He wandered into the living room carrying his glass of juice. In the half light of the early morning he studied the room. The furniture was all older, but in good shape. The walls were freshly painted, but they could use a couple of pictures. It would be nice to have a rug in front of the fireplace, too.
Jason sat down in the middle of the sofa and pulled his feet up into his crotch. He cradled the glass in his lap. He thought about how the house looked from outside. The house had three dormers on the front with curtains on the windows. He figured there must be at least two bedrooms up there and somewhere there was a stairwell that went up to them.
Standing up he looked around the room, taking stock of the doors. He walked into the hall. There were doors on either side at the end that he knew opened into bedrooms. There were three more doors closer to him. The one on the left opened into a third bedroom and on the right hand wall, the first one was a linen closet. Opening the other one he discovered the stairs. Letting his curiosity lead him, he padded up the stairs in his bare feet. The landing faced the wall. Jason turned around and saw that it was one big room. There was a rail around the stairwell which was centered at the end of the room. And on each side of the landing there was a small room in each corner. He turned to look into the one on the left. It was a 3/4 bath with a large shower stall and two sinks. Opening the other door he found a walk-in closet half filled with stacked boxes. A few old clothes hung on one of the racks.
There were three single beds lined down the length of the room, each with a table and lamp beside it. 'Man,' Jason thought, this would be perfect for him and Pete as soon as Pete regained his strength and could climb the stairs. First, they'd have to get rid of the single beds. Maybe they could put a king-sized one up here. Jason sat down on the end of the closest bed and daydreamed about what it was going to be like living with his lover.
He heard his name called. He ran down the stairs yelling out that he was coming. When he burst into Pete's bedroom he saw Pete sitting on the edge of the bed partially dressed. Jason couldn't hold back his laughter. Pete had managed to get one of the altered football jerseys over his head and his good arm into the sleeve, but it was bunched up on his back where he couldn't reach it. He'd pulled his jeans on, but his shorts were bunched up around the top and he couldn't button them up with only one hand. He had a sock partially on one foot and held the other in his hand looking exasperated.
"That's right, just stand there and laugh at me."
"I'm sorry, Petey, but you look so like a little kid that hasn't learned to dress himself."
"You didn't think I looked like a little kid last night."
Jason sauntered over to him and caressed his face. "No, Lover, last night you were all man."
Pete wrapped his arm around Jason's waist and pulled him against him. He kissed his neck and whispered in his ear. "I like the idea of being your lover. When I get this cast off I'll do it right, Babe."
"Doing it right couldn't be any better than last night. I really got into playing 'Cowboy'."
"Yeah, it was fun, even hampered by this damned cast."
"I thought I'd died and gone to heaven and you were my own personal angel."
"So why were you calling me a devil?" Pete asked.
Jason pushed back and looked at him with a leer. "Because you were so devilishly good at making me feel good."
"I love making you feel good, Jase."
"I love you, Pete." Jason kissed him on the end of his nose and pulled away. "Come on, let's get you dressed."
He pulled Pete to his feet and straightened the jersey and then pinned it down his side under his encased arm. He then knelt in front of him and pulled down Pete's jeans, straightened his boxers and then stood to pull up the jeans while stuffing the shorts smoothly into them. He couldn't resist coddling Pete's wonderful cock and balls before stuffing them into the jean's.
Pete drew in a sharp breath. "You better get that thing in there fast, 'cause it won't fit in a few seconds."
Jason grinned at him as he carefully zipped him up, then said, "Sit."
Pete did as commanded, but grouched that he wasn't a dog. Jason ignored the comment and knelt to put his socks on. He kissed the top of his instep and caressed the whole foot.
"Oh God, Jase stop that, or you'll have to take all these clothes back off of me."
Jason grinned up at him and slipped the sock over his foot. The door bell rang. Jason quickly did the other one, then jumped up and ran to let Jim in. Jim looked at the young man and raised an eyebrow. "It can't be seeing me that put that grin on your face. What have you been up to?"
Jason had figured out that Jim was mostly bark and that he'd back off if barked back at. "Same as the last two years, Mom. Five foot three and a half inches still."
"I'll mom you, you little fucker," Jim grinned at Jason's impudence. He was happy to see the 'little one' standing up to him.
"You've already mommed me, Jim. But you better watch your step or I'll sic Jake on you."
Pete had wiggled his feet in to his trainers and walked out to the living room at that moment, distracting Jim from his retort. Instead he said, "Well, look who is up and looking chipper this morning. How did you sleep?"
"Fine." Pete said as he looked at his young lover and grinned. Jim didn't miss the look.
"Sooo. You guys finally did it, huh?" Jim grinned from one to the other.
Jason bristled. "How do you know we hadn't done it before?"
Jim's grin grew. "Because you were both acting like a couple of uptight little virgins yesterday, and today I get a feeling of relaxed emotions. Plus you both have that just fucked look."
Both young men blushed.
"See. I'm right." Jim grinned, having succeeded in embarrassing the two young men, he changed the subject. "So what shall we have for breakfast?"
While Jim whipped up a batch of French toast and sage sausage patties, Jason set the table and poured three glasses of orange juice. Pete couldn't keep the smile off his face as he sat and watched him. Jason was so cute and animated. He was saying something about finding a big bedroom upstairs that he wanted for him and Pete to move into. Pete was only absorbing a little of what he was saying. He was mostly dreaming about undressing Jason and kissing him all over, especially his cute little pert pink buns.
Jim brought him back to reality by dropping a plate of sausage and French toast on the table in front of him. he'd thoughtfully cut up everything bite-size so Pete wouldn't have to struggle with just one hand.
After breakfast Jason dragged Jim upstairs to show him the room. Although Pete's strength still wasn't up to par and having been told by Jim to sit and relax, he rebelled against it and slowly climbed the stairs. He sat on the top step and looked around. Jason was dragging Jim by his hand like a little boy. The big muscleman nurse was chuckling at his excitement. Pete felt a twinge of jealousy. Jason sat on the edge of a bed and bounced.
"Isn't this the coolest room, Jim?" He at that moment noticed his lover sitting on the top step with his head resting against the newel post. "Pete, you're supposed to be resting," he yelled running over to him.
Jim beat him there and swooped Pete up in his strong arms.
"I'm all right. Please, just put me down. I'm not a damned baby."
But by the time he had his protest out, Jim was gently laying him on the bed.
"You mind about as well as a baby. What do you mean climbing those stairs?"
"I wanted to see, too." Pushing Jim away so he could sit up, which was always a chore with the heavy immobilizing cast. Jim moved, but only to help him sit up.
"Damn this thing," Pete grumbled.
"Well, next time you'll look before running in front of a moving car," Jim said, joking, but he knew instantly from the way both boys reacted that it was the wrong thing to say.
"I'd do it again in a heartbeat," Pete muttered.
"Jim, you don't know what happened do you?" Jason asked.
"Just that Pete was hit by a car."
"He saved Da---"
"Jason!" Pete snapped.
"What? You're a hero. What are you protesting about?" Jason turned to Jim. "He saw a car barreling down on Mr. Gates and ran out and pushed him out of the way. The car hit Pete instead."
"Oh. That explains everything." He turned to Pete with a new respect in his eyes. "You are a hero, Dude."
Pete tried to frown at him. "I still hate this fucking cast."
"Sorry, but that's the price you paid."
"Yeah, well, fuck you."
"Nope. Only Jake gets to do that," Jim replied.
"Well, let me call him and tell him to do it then."
"Oh, would you, please?"
"Jim, you are incorrigible."
"Pete, did you see the big shower in the bathroom up here?" Jason asked to distract the other two from their bickering. "Come on, let me show you." Jason grabbed his hand pulling him to his feet.
"You know you could just about fit my whole house up here," Jim said as he looked around.
"I thought you and Jake lived together," Pete said while following Jason.
"Nah, we haven't gotten that far along in our relationship."
Pete stopped in the bathroom door and looked at him. "And you've been seeing each other how long?"
"Two and a half years."
"Wow, this is huge. You could get four guys in here easily." Pete said as he inspected the bathroom. He turned back and looked at Jim. "Why are you holding back?"
"How do you know it's me?"
"Because Jake is soooo in love with you."
"And how do you know that? Has he been talking to you?"
"Jim. Open your eyes. Just how many men do you know who would drop what they're doing and come running to save your ass like he did yesterday?"
Jim nodded but didn't answer. Pete and Jason silently watched him as he became very introspective and wandered off down the stairs. Jason then stared up at Pete.
"What?"
"You are just so awesome, Pete. The more I'm around you, the more I admire you."
"I only told him what was obvious."
"To you. Not to him... and I didn't see it."
"So you want to make this room into our nest?" Pete asked to change the subject.
"Don't you like it, Pete?"
"I love it. I think it's perfect. Let's get a big king-size bed for up here."
"Do you think Dave will mind?"
"I doubt it, but let's ask him."
Two days later Jason walked into the house after class. He stopped in the kitchen and said "hi" to Jim and asked where Pete was.
Jim grinned and said, "He's upstairs waiting for you, I suspect."
Jason dropped his books on a chair and bounded up the stairs.
He froze when he saw the change in the room. The single beds were gone and now there was a big bed at the far end with a chest on each side and bedside lamps. New curtains hung on all the windows. There were two desks and two big club chairs - and a big braided rug in the middle of the floor. He tried to take it all in at once and then he saw Pete grinning at him, propped up on a pile of pillows in the middle of the bed.
"How did you do this?" Jason managed to ask through his astonishment.
"I made the mistake of asking Dave if it was okay to make this into our room."
Arlen Aldridge was in three of the same classes as Pete. He'd taken no notice of Pete until he was suddenly famous for saving some man's life. Of course, with the cast on his upper torso and arm, one couldn't help but notice Pete. When Arlen walked into his first class of the day, he stopped to watch Pete as he struggled with his unwieldy book bag, trying to extract a note book and text for class. When all of his books spilled out onto the floor, Arlen dropped his own books onto the desk next to Pete and knelt to pick them up.
Pete wasn't expecting the big handsome football jock's help and when he turned to see who was picking up his books, he managed to hit him on the top of his head with his suspended cast arm, sending Arlen sprawling on his butt.
"Oh damn, I'm sorry."
Rubbing his head with one hand while hanging onto the books he'd picked up with the other, Arlen grinned up at him. "You are dangerous. So that's the thanks I get for trying to help you?" he joked.
"I'm sorry, I just seem to clonk anybody that gets near me. Thanks for the help."
Arlen smiled while separating the two books Pete needed for this class and placing the rest of them back in his bag. "No problem, Man." He started to pat Pete on the back, but feeling the hard cast under his sweatshirt, ended up tousling his hair instead. Pete blushed. He wasn't used to big jocks paying any attention to him, much less touching him.
Arlen sat at the desk next to Pete. "It must be a hassle doing a lot of things for yourself with your arm up like that."
"It sure is, but I have plenty of help."
"Oh, so how do you shower with that thing?"
Pete blushed again. "I don't."
Arlen thought about that with a look of distaste.
Seeing Arlen's expression, Pete added, "I have a nurse that comes in to help wash me."
"I take it you don't live in a dorm."
"No, I live up on Elm in a house."
"That's a nice neighborhood. It must cost a lot. How many roommates have you got?"
"Just one. But we got a special deal."
"Cool."
At that moment the professor walked in putting an end to the conversation. When the class ended, Arlen took Pete's books and put them back into his book bag for him. Pete blushed again. Arlen noticed and said with grin, "You're cute when you do that."
"Do what?" Pete asked, knowing full well that he was referring to his blushing.
"When you get embarrassed."
Pete's flushed skin darkened with more blood rushing to the surface. He looked everywhere except at Arlen.
"I'm sorry, Man. I really didn't mean to embarrass you more," Arlen said.
"That's alright. I blush easily."
They had moved with the crowd exiting the class room. When they were in the middle of the hall Arlen stopped.
"I don't even know your name," Arlen dissembled. "I'm Arlen Aldridge."
"Everyone knows who you are... I'm Pete Peterson."
"Hey, that's cool we're both alliterative. It's good to meet you, Pete."
"Alliterative? Are you sure you're a football jock?"
"Yeah. Jocks can have brains, too, you know."
"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have profiled you."
"Hey, it's okay. Nearly everyone is surprised that I'm not just a good looking muscle head."
Pete blushed again and said, "I've got to go. I'll see you in Geometry later. It was nice meeting you. And thanks for helping me."
Arlen smiled in response and watched Pete walk away. He saw a small guy with shiny black hair step away from the wall and fall into step with him. "Jason," Arlen muttered to himself, remembering his confrontation with the little dude at freshman registration. He couldn't help but notice that their arms touched constantly as they walked. He sighed and headed off to his next class.
"Do you know who that was you were talking to?" Jason asked as he fell in beside Pete. He glanced back and saw Arlen watching them walk away. He unconsciously moved closer to Pete.
"Yeah."
"That was Arlen Aldridge, the quarterback."
"I know."
"Why was he talking to you?"
Pete bristled. "What? I'm not good enough for him to talk to?"
"Come on Pete, you know what I'm saying. Those football jocks are in a league of their own. They don't usually condescend to talking to non-jocks."
"Sorry. He helped me pick up my books when I spilled them on the floor. He's a nice guy."
"And handsome, too."
"And smart. He knows what alliteration is."
"What's that?"
"You know what it means. It's the repetition of a sound. Like Pete Peterson or Arlen Aldridge."
"Oh, I knew that. I just forgot." Jason muttered. He didn't understand why, but he felt smaller at that moment.
In the weeks that followed, Arlen sat next to Pete in all the classes they had together and helped him with his books. They visited and got to know each other better. Pete never said anything about his relationship with Jason, assuming that Arlen would shun him when he learned that he was gay and in a permanent relationship.
Arlen had already figured that out for himself, since he'd been observing Pete every chance he got. He'd seen how several times a day Pete met up with Jason. And he'd noted how the smaller boy always took Pete's heavy book bag from him and carried it to his next class. Arlen began to feel like a stalker. He had long denied to himself that he was gay, but Pete brought out his deeply submerged desires and longings. Pete was almost an obsession with him. There was something about the wholesome country boy that Arlen found so attractive. A naivete... an innocence that made him want to be close to him, and as he got to know Pete, the feelings just became stronger. Arlen was an expert at lying to himself. He kept telling himself that it wasn't anything more than wanting to be friends with Pete.
One day Arlen casually asked Pete who his little slave boy was. Pete stuttered and stammered, finally getting out that his name was Jason and he was his roommate.
"He's in love with you. Did you know that?"
The moment of truth had arrived. Pete stared Arlen in the eyes. "Yes, I know that. And the feeling is mutual."
Arlen stared back a moment and then smiled. "Cool."
"So aren't you going to punch me in the face and call me a faggot?" Pete asked.
Arlen gaped at him a moment and then shook his head. "No. Why should I do something stupid like that? It's okay with me if you guys are lovers."
"Really?"
"Yeah, really." Arlen answered, convincing himself as well as Pete that it was okay.
It was about a week later at the end of their last class of the day together that Arlen engaged Pete in conversation as they sat at their desks waiting for the room to clear, so Pete could exit without maiming somebody with his suspended arm.
"Have you ever kissed anyone bigger than you?" he asked.
Pete had gotten so used to Arlen's blunt, off the wall questions that he didn't blush much anymore, but this time he did. "No. Jason is the only guy I've ever kissed."
"Aren't you curious as to what it would be like?"
"I haven't ever thought about it, but... yeah, I guess I am."
As the last person filed out they rose to follow. When they got to the door Arlen gave into his impulsive desire, stopped Pete, turned him around and embraced him in a kiss, made awkward by the cast.
At first Pete resisted, but then gave in and started kissing him back. It was a new experience. Pete found that there was something to be said for being the smaller one for once. He clung to Arlen with his good arm and enjoyed the moment.
Jason had rushed out of his last class and ran to meet up with Pete. He leaned against the wall outside the classroom, waiting. After all the other students had emerged and Pete hadn't, Jason went to the door to see what was holding him up. When he saw his lover enfolded in the big handsome football jock's arms, he turned and fled. He ran to the car, jumped in and peeled out of the student parking lot. When he came to a stop in their driveway, he turned off the engine and sat staring out the windshield, the sight of Pete wrapped in Arlen's arms still branded on his brain.
He thought about how much he loved Pete, but if Pete wanted someone else........ 'Well, there is no way a puny little shit like me can compete with a big jock like Arlen.'
All of his life, as far back as he could remember, his father, a large man, had called him a puny little shit. Jason had come to eventually think of himself that way. The only thing big he'd been in his whole life was a disappointment to his father. Jason had been born premature at seven months. His mother's ill health hadn't let her carry him to term. She had been ill all his life and when he was thirteen she'd finally succumbed to the illness. His father had always drank too much, and though he wasn't physically abusive, he was very verbally so. Jason would never forget overhearing him tell his mother that the only thing that she had ever accomplished in her life was bearing a useless little runt.
Between his diminutive size and the verbal abuse he'd grown up with, Jason had little competitiveness when it came to big men like Arlen. And if Pete wanted Arlen rather than him, then the only option Jason had was to move on.
He moved his stuff out of their upstairs nest into the old master bedroom. He'd start looking for a new place to live tomorrow. That was the only way he could see for keeping what little dignity he had.
* * *
When Pete realized he was kissing Arlen back, he pushed away from him. "Don't. This is wrong."
Arlen was breathing heavy. "Why? We both wanted it."
"Arlen, I really like you, but I'm committed. I'm in love with Jason."
Arlen's face blanked of all emotion. "That little twit?"
"He's my lover, my mate... and he's not a twit."
Pete watched Arlen's expression darken.
"You're a damned prickteaser, just like some girl." Arlen snarled and stomped off, leaving Pete in a state of shock.
Pete watched him disappear around the corner, sighed, picked up his book bag and headed to the parking lot to meet Jason. He was feeling guilty for giving in to the kiss with Arlen. He knew he'd have to confess to Jason before he could feel easy about it. When he got to the parking lot and saw the car missing, a sense of dread and foreboding filled him.
He pulled out his cell phone and called Jason.
"What?" Jason answered. Until that moment he hadn't felt any anger, but when Pete asked, "Where are you, Babe?" Jason was suddenly filled with it. He'd been looking at the photo of the two of them with their arms around each other that they kept on the dresser
"What do you care?"
"Jason? What's wrong?"
"Like you don't know."
"Jason?"
"Look, if you need a ride, ask Arlen." Jason cut the connection, turned his phone off, dropped the framed photo on the floor and ground it under his heel. But it didn't make him feel one damned bit better.
Pete redialed and listened to it ring until the automated voice announced that the party wasn't available. He sighed and sat down on the edge of the sidewalk. He knew that Jason often met him outside his classroom. Today must have been one of those days, and Jason had seen Arlen and him kissing.
He struggled to his feet and started the cold trudge home. It was only three and a half blocks, but he didn't have a jacket and the weather was grey and blustery, so by the time he got to the house, he was thoroughly chilled. The car was in the driveway so he knew Jason was home.
He entered the front door expecting to be met by a blast of heat, but was disappointed. It was only around sixty degrees inside. He turned up the thermostat remembering that today was Jim's day off, he sighed and went looking for Jason. The kitchen was dark and there was no food heating. He sighed and trudged up the stairs figuring that was where Jason would be.
The first thing he noticed when he got to the top of the stairs was that the closet door was open and Jason's side was empty. He turned and scanned the room, Jason's drawers in the big mahogany chest were hanging open and empty. His heart dropped. The enlarged photo of the two of them lay on the floor. It was obvious that Jason had ground it under his heel. Pete dragged himself over to the bed and collapsed onto it. Pulling the covers over himself, he stared at the ceiling trying to hold back the tears, but it was a losing battle and the sobs wracked his body.
* * *
Jason sat in the big winged back arm chair in the old master bedroom with his knees pulled up to his chest. He'd not cried. But he had pretty much worn himself out with his anger by the time he heard Pete open the front door. He listened to him trudge through the house into the kitchen and then up the stairs to the big room that had been their bedroom.
After several minutes of not hearing any more noise, he silently slid out of the big chair and in his stocking feet tiptoed into the hall and listened. He could near no sounds so he entered the stairwell and crept up the stairs. He stopped when he got up far enough to see Pete rolled up in the bedding. Pete's sobbing tore at his heart, but the image of him kissing Arlen quickly hardened it. He went back downstairs to the bedroom, put on his shoes and a warm jacket and slipped out of the house.
He stood on the stoop and stared at the little white Honda. It had been his until this afternoon. The car had been purchased with the money Dave had awarded Pete for saving his life. Everything was really Pete's. The house, the car, both of the new computers. Everything that he'd thought of as theirs had been purchased with Pete's reward money. What a fool he'd been. As he thought about it, he felt like he'd been bought... like a prostitute. Pete had paid for everything.... even him.
Jason stepped down to the sidewalk and plodded down the street with no destination in mind, he just had to get away. In his meandering he ended up in front of Gates-Way Bookstore where Pete worked before the accident. He stared vacantly through the window, not registering what he was seeing until his eyes touched on a book.
The author's name jumped off the cover at him. Jake Shipman. Jake had become like a big brother, the only big person that Jason felt would not look down on him. He hadn't seen Jake since he and Jim had broken up and Jake had dropped out of sight. Jason had Jake's cell number in his phone's address book. He pulled the little jewel out of his pants pocket, turned it back on and found the number. He dialed it and waited.
Jake finally answered, "Shipman."
"Jake?"
"Yeah, who is this?"
"I'm Jason."
"Hey buddy, what's wrong?"
"I need somebody to talk to. Can I come see you?"
"You sound really down. I'm not in town, little buddy. But I'll talk to you all you want on this phone."
Jason sighed. "Pete and I broke up. I don't have any place to stay."
"He kicked you out of that big old house?"
"No. I could stay there, but it would be awful with him having his new boyfriend there."
"I can't imagine Pete with anyone but you."
"Yeah, well his new boyfriend is a big football jock."
"I can see how that would be most uncomfortable."
"I gave up my room in the dorm when Dave gave Pete that big house to live in."
"I tell you what, Jase. I'm not using my apartment right now. Why don't you move in there until you get things straightened out?"
"You mean it, Jake?"
"Anything for my little buddy."
Jake gave Jason instructions on how to get a key. And without going back for any clothes, his books or anything, he went directly to Jake's. He stripped off his clothes, crawled into Jake's big bed and dozed off and on, waking and wondering where and how Pete was. Sometime during the night his cell phone rang, waking him only enough to mutter a curse before slipping back into his uneasy sleep.
Pete woke about nine that evening. The house was deathly quiet. He slid off the bed and stood up. He wandered downstairs, wondering where Jason was. When he opened the master bedroom door he saw that all of Jason's belongings had been moved down into that closet. He knew for certain then that Jason had seen the kiss. His chest ached with regret. He felt he should be angry with Arlen, but all he really felt was disappointment in himself.
Wandering listlessly into the kitchen he wondered where Jason was. They didn't really have any close friends that he could run to. He pictured his little lover huddled in a coffee shop or a café and thought about going to look for him.
He stepped out the front door and saw the car sitting in the driveway. Maybe Jason was in the house. He stepped back in and called out. Silence answered. Going into the hallway he bellowed, "Jason. Please answer me." Silence again.
God damn this cast. He couldn't drive his car with his arm in the air. He shambled into the livingroom and crumpled into a chair. His eyes burned, and his head hurt, but not as much as the ache in his chest. As he wondered what to do, he thought about Arlen. Maybe he'd gotten over being miffed by Pete's rejection. Maybe he'd help him look for Jason. He looked up his number in the student directory and called him.
"Arlen, it's Pete."
"What do you want? I'm studying."
"Jason saw us."
"Yeah? So what? It was just a kiss. What do you want me to do about it?"
"He's gone."
"So? What's that to me?"
Pete thought a moment. "I thought you were my friend. I apologize for disturbing you. You really had me fooled into believing that you were more than a football jerk." He disconnected, feeling lower still.
It dawned on him as he slumped back into the chair that Jason always carried his cell phone. He quickly dialed it and listened to it ring. He disconnected and redialed and listened to it ring some more. With every ring his spirits sank a little lower.
Pete's words stung, but they made Arlen think about what he had done and how badly he'd reacted when Pete didn't give in to his desires. He'd definitely acted like a jerk, blaming Pete for his own feelings and actions. Although Arlen had been feeling he would like to know Pete in a more intimate way, he realized he wanted him as a friend even more. He decided an apology was in order, but his roommate had come in before he could call Pete back. The thing to do he decided, was to get up early and go over and apologize in person and volunteer to help Pete look for Jason.
Jason awoke before the dawn. Lying in the dark, he collected his thoughts after remembering where he was and why he wasn't snuggled up to Pete. He felt bad about the way he'd reacted. He'd not given Pete any quarter for what had happened. He didn't even know if it had gone beyond just a kiss. He didn't know what Pete was planning with Arlen, if anything.
'But then,' he thought, 'Pete hasn't even tried to find or contact me'. Jason hadn't stopped to consider that Pete couldn't drive the car, or that he was hidden away in Jake's apartment where Pete couldn't find him. He'd forgotten about the phone ringing in the middle of the night.
He got up, washed his face and wandered into the kitchen. Opening the fridge, he discovered that it was bare except for a bottle of Heinz Catsup and several cans of Bud. He searched the cabinets for coffee grounds and found a small bag of stale gourmet roast. After smelling it, he threw it in the trash. He'd just have to get a cup on the way home. If he left now he'd have a chance to talk to Pete before he left for class. He grabbed his jacket, locked the door and headed across the campus.
The morning was chilly. He pulled the collar up around his neck and stuffed his hands into his jacket pockets and headed toward a hot cup of brew. In the middle of the quad he heard someone call his name. He ducked his head and hurried on. A few moments later he heard someone running up behind him. He whirled, ready to go down fighting.
"Jason, I thought that was you. What are you doing out so early. You and Pete should still be snuggled and cozy." It was Dave Gates and his partner out for a morning jog.
Jason relaxed. "I'm just out for a walk."
Dave could see from Jason's forlorn expression that it was much more than that. "Is there trouble in paradise?" he asked.
Jason's shoulders sagged. He nodded and looked away.
"Do you want to talk about it?"
Jason shook his head.
"Well, you know where we live. If you need anything just come on up," Dave said.
"Keep your head up, Jase, Pete loves you. You know that," Joe said.
"Thanks, Guys." Jason gave them a semblance of a smile, turned and trudged on toward the coffee shop.
Once he got a large cup of good strong American coffee he headed the four blocks on home. As he rounded the corner he saw a red Mustang parked behind their car in the driveway. He froze.
Arlen was always an early riser. Usually by six in the morning he was tying his running shoes in preparation for a morning jog. This morning he dressed in regular clothes, hopped into his Mustang and headed over to Pete's. He'd called Pete to see if Jason had come back or if he'd found where he'd gone. Pete, in a haze, forgot for the moment what the last words were that he and Arlen had yesterday, and just accepted the fact that he would soon be over to help search for Jason. Arlen figured he would do his apologizing when he knew Pete was fully awake.
Pete had fallen asleep in the big lounger and had spent the night there. He'd had a miserable night, but he could see no reason to go to bed. It was bad enough sleeping with the damned cast, but without Jason in bed beside him, and the fact that there was no way to get the oversized sweat shirt off, he could see no reason to go through the trouble.
Arlen's call had roused him enough to let him realize his bladder was near to bursting. He tried to bring the chair upright. He hadn't realized Jason was always there to give the extra boost so he could get out of the chair. Alone, it was impossible with the weight of the cast. He wondered how he'd managed to get out of the chair so easily that first day when he'd chased after Jason.
He tried rolling over the arm. That didn't work. And then he thought about the dynamics of what the position of his weight in the chair did. He slid his butt to the front edge of the seat which lowered the weight of his torso and cast on the chair back. He was dumped onto the floor as the chair folded into an upright position. He sat there stunned for a minute and then struggled to turn over, get to his knees and stand up. He tried again to picture how he'd gotten out of the chair that first time and couldn't. He shrugged and figured that it had to have been a fluke of emergency.
He went into the bathroom and shucked his sweat pants, shoes and socks. Filling the sink with warm water, he proceeded to wash himself. The washing he found pretty easy, but the drying wasn't, managing the large bath towel was difficult. It had been so much more simple to just stand with his legs spread and let his lover do it all for him.
For a moment he wondered if Arlen might do the things for him that Jason seemed to take such pleasure in. He shunned the thought. God, he missed his beautiful little guy... his sparkling bright blue eyes, and that shock of shiny raven black hair always hanging over his forehead. And his shy smile, Pete felt that he would shrivel and die if he couldn't get that smile back into his life.
Pete managed with little trouble to pull on a pair of sweat pants. He attempted to pull a sock onto his foot with one hand without falling over. How he hated this helplessness. He threw the sock down and slipped his feet into his trainers leaving them untied. He stood and looked in the mirror. An unkempt slob looked back at him. Grimacing in disgust, he went back to the bathroom to comb his unwashed hair. He wished that he could rub the deodorant stick under his arm, but of course that was impossible
Jim would do it all for him, he knew.... if he waited until eight, but Arlen would be here in a few minutes to pick him up to begin his search for Jason. Jason.... never in his life did Pete regret anything like he did that kiss yesterday. The stinging words that Arlen had slapped him with as he broke away from him stung again as he recalled the event.
The doorbell rang. Arlen was met with a hard glare when Pete opened the door. Arlen looked contrite. "Looks like you woke up."
Pete continued to glare.
"Pete, I apologize. It was a shitty jock attitude I pulled on you yesterday. And last night, too. I really would like to be friends with you. I promise to behave myself and respect your relationship with Jason. Let me help you find him. It's the least I can do, since it's my fault he's gone. Please?"
Pete's expression relaxed as Arlen ran out of gas. "Come on in, you big lunk."
For the next fifteen minutes Arlen grilled Pete about where Jason might have gone and got nowhere. He sat and thought, then looked up at Pete and grinned. "I've got an idea. Let's get the whole campus and neighborhood to look for him."
Jason was ready to turn back when he saw the front door open and Arlen step out. As Pete followed and turned to lock the door, Jason panicked. He didn't want them to see him. Looking around, frantic to find a place to hide, he ducked and ran behind the neighbor's hedge and crouched down.
He watched Arlen open the Mustang's passenger door and help Pete settle into the seat. Tears filled Jason's eyes at the intimacy of the act. Not for a moment did he stop to consider that it was just the caring actions of a friend. As they drove away he stood and watched the car disappear around the corner.