"Hey, what are you doing?" the voice said when I answered the phone. It was Cherie. "I'm talking on the phone," I said. "Me, too," she said. I loved that girl as much as I loved my brother, and he knew it, too. "Any news," I asked. "No. We just got back from the doctor, and he reminded me the first ones often are slow in arriving. Kevin, I am so ready for this baby to get here, I could scream. It's so damn hot," she said. "So, when do you go back?" I asked. "In a week. The official due date isn't until the thirtieth, of course, so it's not like I'm overdue or anything. I guess I just have to sweat it out, and I mean that quite literally," she said. "What's going on there? How are the Montana boys?" "They're wonderful, Sis," I said. "I wish all of you could meet them. You wouldn't have any way of appreciating this, but the change in Chris since last summer is just short of miraculous. He has to wear a leg brace on his right leg, but that thing doesn't slow him down one bit. And you should see him go at it in the weight room. Let me tell you. That boy is driven." "What about the other one?" she asked. "He's sort of a younger Brian, actually. He's as cute as a button, and he's very smart, too. But so is Chris. He and Brian were good friends last summer, and they're bonding even more right now. Dave is his name. He and Brian are training dogs with Brian's Dog Man," I said. "Is Brian in summer school?" she asked. "Yeah, he is. He's taking American History in this first half, and it's a shame because it's really no challenge for him. He's taking it for new credit, but he's in there with a bunch of people who failed it last school year. Naturally, the teacher is taking it very slowly, and rather superficially, too, I might add. Brian has already read the whole textbook, and the teacher more or less has him on sort of an independent study program. He is so smart. He's taking trig the second half of summer school," I said. "You're not bragging just a little bit about your son, now, are you?" she asked. "Yes, damn it, I am bragging about my son, but I'm not exaggerating. He's simply incredible. What can I say?" I said. "Why is he doing this, anyway?" she asked. "He's doing this so he can graduate a year early. He wants to start Tulane a year from this coming fall, when Tim starts there. Rick and I were leery of it at first, and we're still not convinced it's the best thing for his education. But how do you tell four guys like them that they can't stay together as a group? I know it would only be for a year, but Tim and Brian are bound and determined to go through college and medical school together, as a team," I said. "Are you sure there's nothing going on between them?" she asked. "I'm absolutely sure, Sis. I'd be more worried about the older two than I would be those guys, but I'm also absolutely sure Kyle and Justin are faithful to their guys," I said. "Changing the subject slightly, I wish all of you could come for the Fourth." "Oh, I know. We had such a good time last year for that. Is there going to be a big party again this year?" she asked. "Of course. Tim, Kyle, and Brian have it all planned. The gift theme this year is money," I said. "The Big Four all want to go to Europe together next summer, so they're saving their money." "The irony is, Kyle could probably buy them a small country, if he wanted to," she said. "It's that much, huh?" I said. She was Kyle's attorney, so she knew. "Oh, Kevin, it's vast. I wish I could tell you, but you know I can't," she said. "Yeah, I know. Does he know?" I asked. "Well, yeah, more or less. He knows approximately how much he's worth, but the figures change hourly, almost. He's totally uninterested in it, though. I've needed to talk to him a few times in the last month or so, and every time I've called him, all he's wanted to talk about was the baby. I know he's young, Kevin, but he's not stupid," she said. "Yes, he is young, and, no, he's not stupid," I said. "But those are his values, Cherie. Kyle is the most people-oriented person I have ever known, by far. And pretty much one of the most un-materialistic ones, too. I'm surprised he hasn't wanted to set up trust funds for his boys." "What makes you think he hasn't?" she asked. "I advised against that for now, but that's definitely down the road. God, I want to tell you so much. This confidentiality shit is killing me!" I laughed. "Well, but you have to be a good little lawyer-girl, now, don't you?" "Yeah. Listen, I need to go. It's been twenty minutes since I last peed. It's time again," she said. I laughed. "Take care, Sis. I want instant updates whenever anything happens, you hear?" I said. "Oh, I know, and you'll get them, too, either from me or from Craig. Kevin, I love you, but I really do have to go. Bye." She hung up before I could tell her goodbye. The stuff she said about Kyle didn't really surprise me. Rick and I were still uncovering the depths of Gene Goodson's business interests, and I knew the man was much richer than we had ever imagined. * * * "I talked to Cherie today," I said, when we were gathered in the den for our after-work snack. The boys and Rick had worked out, and they hadn't showered yet. The house smelled like a locker room. "What'd she say?" Kyle demanded. "She had just been to the doctor, and everything's fine," I said. "That little boy better get his ass out on July 4th. That's all I'm saying," Jus said. "He very well might, Bubba. The doctor reminded her today that first babies are often late," I said. "If that baby is born on my birthday, that's going to be the best present I ever had in my whole life," Jus said. "I know. It'll be a present for all of us," Kyle said. "I talked to her a couple of days ago, and she told me she was really suffering from the heat. Is that any better?" "No, it isn't. She mentioned that," I said. "This is the hottest I've ever been in my life," Chris said. "Me, too, Chris," Paddy said. "I thought I had come to paradise." "Not in the summer. This is fucking hell in the summer," Kyle said. "Now, fall, winter, and spring are a different story. It's great here, then. Not the summer, though. Did y'all know they invented air conditioning in Apalachicola, Florida, not sixty miles from here?" "Kyle, it was refrigeration, not air conditioning," Brian said. "Same difference. Somebody over there figured out how to get cool," Kyle said. "That's a pretty major invention," Paddy said. "What was the name of the town?" "Apalachicola. We call it Apalach. When we were at the state science fair, there was a boy and his teacher from Apalach at our table," Kyle said. "Y'all remember that boy?" "Yeah, I remember him," Brian said. "Did y'all think he was gay?" Kyle asked. "Hell, there was no question he was gay," Justin said. "I didn't think the teacher was, though." "Buddy, when y'all went out to smoke, we came out to him. The boy was flabbergasted. His teacher told him that's why they had to leave Franklin County from time to time, so they could meet different kinds of people," Brian said. "Every place I've been has been air conditioned," Paddy said. "It's not like that in the Boston area." "Montana, either," Chris said. "For example, we don't have air conditioning in our house." "For real?" Kyle demanded. "Yeah, for real," Chris said. "We have windows, Kyle." "Yeah, and so do we, and I'm going to throw your ass out one, if you don't behave," Kyle said. We all laughed. "We don't open them, though, except maybe a couple of weeks a year," Kyle said. "I used to live in an un-air conditioned trailer that wasn't even under a tree," Denny said. "It was so hot I could hardly breathe." "See, to me that's child abuse. Making somebody live in an un-air conditioned house, much less a trailer," Kyle said. "But Kyle, you can freeze to death, but you can't sweat to death," Paddy said. "You can't sweat to death, but I think people die of the heat. That's what I've seen on TV, anyhow. This is making me hot. Let's get in the water," Kyle said. We laughed, but we followed him out to the pool for a swim. * * * The two weeks the Montana boys were there were wonderful. Chris was totally gregarious, as we already knew he was, and he had a fabulous time with his brothers. Dave was sort of quiet. It was obvious he enjoyed being with all of us, but he didn't have all that much to say. If you lined our boys up on a continuum, from bold to meek, it would have to be Kyle-Justin-Tim-Denny-Brian. Dave was very much a Brian, and, not surprisingly, the two of them seemed to be best friends. Paddy was somewhere between Tim and Denny. The big shift came when the Fourth of July approached. That was Justin's birthday, of course, and that was a big thing for our family. It was also the biggest tourist weekend of the year for Emerald Beach, and people from far and wide poured onto our beaches to celebrate. The actual holiday was on a Saturday this year, so that made it even bigger than usual. Seth and Curt were the first to get there on Thursday night, around ten o'clock. They were both working, but they had Friday off, since the Fourth fell on a Saturday. There was a big celebration at our house when they got there. "God, almighty, Seth. What the hell did you do to yourself, man?" Justin said. We hadn't seen Seth since Mardi Gras, and he had grown and changed even more since then. He had been working out a lot, and that boy had really filled out. He wasn't the ugly, scrawny kid he had been when we first met him, that was for sure. "I've been working out, that's all," Seth said. "Well, it damn sure worked, Bubba," Justin said. "You're a big, strapping man, now." Seth had a grin plastered on his face that wouldn't quit. He was obviously proud of himself, and our boys were totally appropriate in noticing and approving of what he had done. "He's filled out good, too," Kyle said, referring to Curt. "I know. I ain't going to the beach with you guys," Justin said. "I don't want to be compared." Seth and Curt were just as happy as they could be, but they both still had a way to go to look like Justin and Kyle. We did our usual pool thing, with lots of eats and drinks, courtesy of Kyle. The next day, we skied and played and had a great time. The guys all went to the beach for a little while, and they came back with identical fake tattoos on their left biceps. I almost had a heart attack when I saw them because they looked so authentic. I thought they were real ones. "Whose idea was this? Kyle?" I asked. I know he could hear the agitation in my voice. "Mine. You like 'em?" he asked. "No, I don't like them one damn bit. What am I supposed to tell Betty and Ralph Uhle? Huh? And they're both underage, to boot," I said. "They're fakes, Kevin," Kyle said. "Lighten up. Do you think we'd get real tattoos?" "Kyle, you've got a real tattoo," I said. "I know, but not where you can see it. Give me some credit, man," Kyle said. He had kind of a hurt look on his face, and I was sorry I had reacted so strongly without thinking it through. "Kyle, I'm sorry I reacted the way I did. I should have known I can trust you," I said. "Every once in a while you really get to me, Kevin, and it's always on the thing of trust. I've got feelings, too, you know," he said. "I know you do, and I hurt them. I'm sorry I did that," I said. "Are we still friends?" "Don't be stupid. Of course we're still friends," he said. "But . . .?" I said. "But nothing. Nothing has changed. I should have told you we were getting them before we went," he said. "I'm sorry I didn't." "Can I have a hug?" I asked. I loved that kid, and I knew I had hurt his feelings. It pained me a lot that I had caused him pain, and for no good reason, either. He was a good kid, and I knew it. That had happened with him once before, and I had resolved then to think before I reacted. I didn't keep that resolution. "Yeah, just don't smear my tattoo," he said. We hugged and we laughed. The other boys had gone out to the pool to show off their new "ink," so it was just Kyle and I in the house. "I really do like them, especially for the holiday," I said. They had gotten a stylized eagle with a patriotic theme. "I'll take you to get one, if you want. It costs fifteen bucks, but the lady said they would last three weeks, unless we used coal cream on them. Tim and I got these summer before last, remember?" he said. "Yeah, I remember. I think I'll pass, but I do like them on you guys," I said. He seemed okay with me, and I was glad. "Okay, but if you change your mind, let me know," he said. "Okay, Bubba. Let's go play with the others," I said, and we did. That night Jerry brought over Vince, the priest from Sarasota. The New Orleans and Sarasota relatives weren't coming, but Alex and Cody called to see if they could come over that night. Of course they could. They were in town for the holiday, too. A bunch of kids were there, too: Chad and Gage; Philip and Ryan; Morgan, Blake, and Riley; Chip; Steve. It was quite an assortment. "Kevin, I didn't expect this tonight," Kyle said. "How are we going to feed all these people?" Justin, Tim, and Brian were in the kitchen with Kyle and me. "Get on the phone. Call your man at the Publix," Justin said. "Kyle, you've done more business there than half the people in Emerald Beach put together. Tell him you've got an emergency party on your hands." "That's what it's got to be, Kevin. I can't feed this many people with what we've got in the house, unless I go into what we've got for tomorrow," he said. "This is an emergency." I started laughing. He was so funny saying that. "What are you laughing at? It ain't funny, Bubba," he said. "Kyle, it's not really an emergency," I said, still laughing. "They're not going to die if you don't put on a spread." He grinned. "I know. It's sort of a hospitality emergency, don't you think? I'm just trying to get prepared for my future," he said. "Kyle, you are already so prepared," I said. "Well, maybe so, but let's get cracking. I want food on those tables out there in one hour. Get busy, boys," he said. And in exactly one hour, we had a buffet table set up that was spectacular. Most of it was cold stuff, like fried chicken and coleslaw and potato salad. Green salad and three vegetable casseroles. He had a huge platter of hot ribs, too, and a platter of boiled shrimp. Boiled crabs, too, of course. There was enough food for twice that many men. "Father Vince, I want to ask you to ask the blessing, if you don't mind," Kyle said, as we were getting ready to eat. "Kyle, I was hoping you would," Vince said. "Heavenly Father, when you created human beings, you said, in effect, I'll let the majority be straight and the minority be gay, as a witness to diversity. We thank you, Father, for that role in society, for our gifts, and for our uniqueness. Some of us have vowed celibacy, and please strengthen us in that vow. Others of us have chosen a life of partnership with another, and grant us the grace of faithfulness to that calling. Others of us are still groping to find our niche in life, and grant us that grace, too. But most of all, Lord, bless us tonight, and these your gifts, which we are about to receive from your bounty, through Christ, our Lord. Amen." There was dead silence after that prayer. He had said so much in so little time. "Let's eat," Kyle said. "Out-of-towners first, and then anybody who can shove in line."
I thought Kevin was going to have a cow over those damn tattoos. I love that man as much as I love my own parents, and I think the world of him, but every now and then he pisses me off and hurts my feelings. I know he doesn't do it on purpose, but it still hurts. "Your tattoos are cool," Father Vince said. Justin and I were at the table with him and Jerry to eat. "Thanks," I said. "We just got them today. They're fakes, though." "I knew that. I mean they look real, but they'd be red and swollen if they were real and you had just gotten them today," he said. "I wish a certain big brother of mine had noticed that," I said. "Who? Kevin?" Justin asked. "Yeah, he crawled all over my ass about 'em right after we got home," I said. "Was he mad?" Jus asked. "Yeah, he was mad. He thought they were real," I said. "We patched it up, though, like we always do." "Father Vince, can I ask you something?" Justin said. "Why don't you just call me Vince? You call him Jerry, don't you?" Father Vince said. "Okay, Vince. Do you mind if I ask you a question?" Jus said. "No. Go ahead. Your name is Justin, right?" "Yes, sir. I'm Justin. What I was wondering was, are you gay?" Vince and Jerry looked at each other and sort of smiled. "Yes, I am, Justin," he said. "I guess I gave myself away during grace, didn't I?" "Yes, sir, that's how I knew," Jus said. "Let me ask you something else. Do you have to be gay to be a priest?" Jerry and Vince laughed, but I thought it was a damn good question, myself. "No, it's not required," Vince said. "In fact, there's a lot of controversy in the Church right now about the number of gay clergy." "I think it's just a coincidence, Jus. You happen to know two priests, and they just happen to be gay," Jerry said. "Y'all aren't the only priests we know," I said. "Father Logan's gay, isn't he?" "You'll have to ask him that," Jerry said. "Is he talking about Tony Logan?" Vince asked. Jerry nodded. Father Logan was the pastor of the church, and Jerry was his assistant. "And that bishop guy in New Orleans, Grandpa's friend. What's his name?" Justin asked. "Bishop Greg," I said. "Yeah, him, and Kevin's Uncle Ray, too. The one that married them. Every priest we know is gay. When he asked that question, I was wondering the same thing." "You guys know a bishop in New Orleans?" Vince asked. "Yeah. He and Kevin's daddy went to high school together. He went to the race track with us, and then came over for a cocktail party at Christmas," I said. "I don't really consider that knowing him, but I did talk to him some, and all. He's a really nice guy." "You guys don't act . . . you know. But that bishop sure does. A blind man could spot that, just from the way he talks," Jus said. "Uncle Ray's pretty much like that, too," I said. "Bishop Gregory Bascomb is the chair of the conference we're going to," Vince said. "It's on celibacy and sexuality. This might make it more interesting." Jerry laughed. "You guys understand that it's possible to be gay and not be sexually active, right?" Vince said. "Oh, yeah. We know all about that from Jerry," Justin said. "I don't think that would be that much fun, though." Jerry and Vince laughed. "Well, let's just say it makes life a little more interesting," Jerry said. * * * I kept my cell phone handy day and night that last week of June and that first week of July, just in case we got us a baby. "What makes you think they're going to call you?" Brian asked the day before the Fourth. "They promised they'd call us the minute he got here," I said. "Yeah, I know, but they're not going to call you," Bri said. "Well, who are they going to call, then?" I asked. "Kevin?" "Oh, yeah," I said. "Kyle, there was a time when I actually thought you were smart, you know that? Forget it," Justin said. We all laughed. "How do you know I don't have Kevin's phone programmed to ring on my number?" I asked. "I don't know. Do you?" Jus said. "No," I replied, and they all laughed some more. I was taking it on the hip, and I deserved it. The waiting ended, though, on the morning of the Fourth of July. We were all in the den having coffee and hanging out in our underwear. The house phone rang. I was next to it, so I answered it. "Hello," I said. "Kyle, it's Craig. Is everybody in the den?" "Yeah. What's going on?" I said. I was very excited. "Put the call on speaker," he said. "Okay," I said, and I did like he told me. "Good morning, guys," Craig said. We all told him hello and what not. "What's up?" Kevin asked. "We've got us a baby boy," he said. Everybody cheered and clapped and whistled. Craig was trying to say something, but nobody could hear him. "Calm down," Kevin said to all of us. "What time was he born, Craig?" "He was born at 6:36 this morning. Mother and son are doing fine," he said. "How big is he?" Rick asked. "Seven pounds, five ounces. I took some pictures of him already, and you can see what he looks like if you open Kevin's email," he said. "Go do it," I said. "Just a second," Kevin replied. "What's your password. I'll do it," I said. "I'm not telling you my password," Kevin said. "Do you know his password?" I asked Rick. "No. Hush," Rick said. "God!" I said. "What did you decide to name him?" Brian asked. Good question, I thought. "Okay, guys, are you ready?" Craig asked. "Yeah, we're ready," Kevin said. "His name is Robert Kevin Foley, and we're going to call him Rob," Craig said. Kevin had the biggest grin on his face I had ever seen. "Thank you, Craig," Kevin said. "I'm the one who should be thanking you, Bubba, don't you think?" Craig said. "When can we come see him?" I asked. "We'll probably leave the hospital tomorrow, but give us a couple of weeks, okay?" "Okay. Keep the pictures coming, though," Kevin said. "I will. I'll get some more out to you today," Craig said. "Is it okay if we put them on the family Web site?" I asked. "Sure. Please do, in fact," Craig said. "You can set up one of those Yahoo photo albums, Kyle," Brian said. "That way all their friends can see them, too." "Very good idea, Brian," Craig said. "Listen, guys, I need to run. Cherie and Rob and I love all of you. Bye." "Bye, Craig," we all said at one time. "Let me go check some email," Kevin said. We all went into the study with him. He fired up the machine and got his email thing open. He clicked on the attachment icon, and up popped a baby. "My God," Kevin said, and big tears started rolling down his cheeks. "He's definitely a Foley, Babe," Rick said. "Kevin, that baby looks more like you than you do," Justin said. "I know," Kevin said. "Guys, I need to be with Rick by ourselves for a few minutes, okay?" "Sure," I said. We all went back to the den, and Kevin and Rick went into their room. "Why is Kevin so upset?" Dave asked. "He's not upset. He's just so happy right now he can't stand it, Dave," I said. "And you know what? So am I." I started crying. That set Tim and Brian off, and even Justin got a little misty-eyed. "I told you he was going to be born on my birthday, didn't I?" Jus said. "I know they're all as happy as they can be. I know I am." I called Jeff and gave him the news, and then I called my parents and told them. Tim called Doc and Sonya, and told them about the baby. "What about the Sarasota grandparents?" Tim asked. "Let's let Rick call them," I said. "I'm trying to think of who else we need to call." "Grandma and Grandpa Foley?" Brian asked. "Naw. They already know," I said. "Duh! Kyle! I know they know, but don't you want to talk to them?" Brian asked. "Kevin would be pissed off if we called his parents," I said. "No, he wouldn't." It was Kevin. He and Rick had come in without me seeing them. "Give 'em a call, but use Grandma's cell number, Kyle," Kevin said. "I'm sure she's at the hospital." I dialed the number, but I got her voice mail. She probably couldn't talk where she was. I left a message for her to call us back as soon as she could. "Seth, you and Curt are going to get to see Rob before any of us," Kevin said. "I know. He really does look a lot like you, Kevin," Seth said. "There's a reason for that," Kevin said. "He was conceived with my sperm." "What!?" two or three of them said. "Artificial insemination," Rick said. "I played a part in it, too." "Yeah, I'll bet you did," Justin said. "Always ready to lend a helping hand, ain't you?" We all laughed. "I don't get it," Dave said. "Rick jerked him off. That's how they got the sperm," Justin said. "Really?" Dave asked. "Yeah, really, Bubba," Kevin said. "But, you know, Rob also looks like his father." "Aren't you his father?" Dave asked. "No, Craig's his father. I'm his uncle," Kevin said. "I'm missing something," Dave said. "No, you aren't. I donated the sperm, so he has my genes, but he's Craig's child. Craig's and Cherie's," Kevin said. "They're his parents, Bubba. Not me." "Well, I think the whole thing's pretty cool," Chris said. * * * The people started arriving for the day-long party around eleven. We did all the things we usually do at a big party like that. Our close friends had a gift of money for Justin, and he did pretty damn good on that haul. We were all saving up to go to Europe, and that was a good start on his amount. Some of the people didn't even know it was his birthday, so we didn't have a public gift opening, or anything. We didn't want them to be embarrassed because they hadn't gotten him anything. Craig sent ten pictures of Rob that day, and Jeff and I set up a photo album on the Web with them. We also posted them to our Web site. I lost track of how many people were in and out that day, but it was right around seventy-five. They didn't all stay the whole time, but they all got at least one beer and something to eat. I used ten gallons of gas in the boat, and I think most of the ones who wanted to ski got a chance to. I didn't stay on the boat all day, though. We had enough drivers, including Chris, that I didn't need to be out there the whole time. I tried to spend as much time with Chris as I could. He and I had had a wonderful time during the two weeks he was here, but he and Dave were leaving on Monday to visit Chris's mother's parents downstate. I tried to keep my mind off the fact that his time with us was almost up, but I knew I was going to miss the hell out of him. A bunch of people commented on our tattoos, and we had fun with those. We sang "The Star-Spangled Banner" right after grace that night, and Justin's birthday cake was patriotic. People who didn't know better thought it was just for the Fourth of July, and it didn't have any candles on it. There was a fireworks display at the County Pier at 9:30 that night, and some of us drove over for that. There were a ton of people at that, and most of them looked sunburned and at least a little bit drunk. Nothing bad happened, though, and the fireworks were pretty good. It was over in an hour, and it took us another forty-five minutes to get out of the parking lot. They need to do something about parking at that pier. The party started breaking up after we got home. Kevin and Rick, and some of the others who stayed behind, cleaned up all the food and everything while we were gone, so we didn't have that to fool with. We went back in the water for a little while. Denny and Dave were worn out, so they went up to bed. Tony had brought his guitar, so we did a little singing, mostly patriotic songs, and then we went to bed. "This has been a hell of a day, hasn't it?" Justin said, as we were walking up the stairs. "I'll say. Happy Birthday, Brother," I said, and I gave him a little kiss on the cheek.
The afternoon of the day before Chris and Dave left, I went to the grocery store with Kyle. It was a Sunday. I didn't usually do much with just him anymore, but I still loved him. I knew that wasn't going anywhere, though. Not as long as Tim was alive, that is. "You like Dave, don't you?" he asked. "Yeah. I like him and Chris and Paddy, too," I said. I wasn't exactly sure what he meant. I didn't know if he meant did I like Dave as a friend or did I like Dave, as a boyfriend. "But not all the same way, right?" he said. I'm sure I blushed. "Don't blush. Dave's a cutie, man," he said. "I like Dave a lot," I said, "and he and I have been sleeping together. I'm just glad Brady isn't here." "Why?" Kyle asked. "Brady and I do it, too," I said. "I figured that. Where is he?" "He's at church camp. You know how religious his parents are," I said. "Is it that same church with that mean minister?" he asked. "No. They belong to a different one now. Do you think I should tell Brady that I've been having sex with Dave?" That had been bothering me, and I was glad it had come up. "Are you and Brady boyfriends?" Kyle asked. "Well, we're best friends, for sure. And, yeah, we're boyfriends," I said. "That's why I feel bad about what I've been doing with Dave." "Do you think Brady would want to break up with you over it?" Kyle asked. "I don't know. He's never met Dave, and he probably never will. Dave will be gone tomorrow, and Brady will be back from camp next week," I said. "Hell, I wouldn't tell him," Kyle said. "At least not right away." "Have you ever cheated on Tim?" I asked. "That's pretty personal, Bubba," Kyle said. "I'm not going to answer that. You don't need to ask guys stuff like that." "I'm sorry, Kyle. Don't be mad at me," I said. There was a long pause. "I know Dave doesn't expect us to be boyfriends," I said. "He had never had sex, and we were both so, I don't know, horny I guess. You don't know what it was like." He was driving, but he turned to look at me. "I don't know what it's like to be horny?" The way he said that was incredibly cute and funny, and I laughed. He laughed, too. "I know you know," I said. "Denny, you're only fifteen. Now before you get mad; just listen to what I'm going to say, okay?" he said. "Okay." "When I was fifteen, I wanted sex all the time. It seemed like I had a hard-on all the time, and I beat off three or four times a day, every day." "You mean jerk off?" I said. "Yeah. Beat off, jerk off. Same thing. What I was going to say is, I would no more have been able to be faithful to Tim than the man in the moon, especially if I had had easy access to sex. The fact is, I wasn't having sex with anybody, but I sure wanted to. I think guys mature, especially when they're in a serious relationship. Are you and Brady serious, you think?" "You mean, are we in love?" I asked. "Yeah," he said. "Yeah, we love each other," I said. "I don't think we're in love like you and Tim are, though. We're not ready to make any kind of commitment or anything. It's more like we're just good friends." "Naw, I wouldn't tell him, then," he said. That night was going to be my last night with Dave because they were leaving the next day, and I decided then and there that we'd have sex again that night. He was a good guy, and I knew he was looking forward to it. I couldn't let him down. But I also decided I wasn't going to ever do it again with anybody if I had a boyfriend. I didn't like the guilt. |