"I hate for the holidays to end," Rick said as he and I put the dishes from breakfast into the dishwasher. "I know. They were good ones, though, weren't they?" I said. "They keep getting better and better I think," he said. "Kev, do you think the kids are committed to running that marathon?" "No. Do you?" "No, I don't. They had all said they were going to start training this morning, but every one of them came up with an excuse why they couldn't. If they're not that interested in doing it, I say we scrap the idea, at least for this year," he said. "Let's talk about it with them tonight," I said, "but I tend to agree with you. For one thing, they're always so damn busy. For another thing, that would be another day of school they'd have to miss. I mean, I don't mind letting them miss for recreation, occasionally, but this is recreation they don't even care about." Kyle and Justin had their English class that night, so they didn't get home until a few minutes before seven. "How was the first day as a desk clerk?" I asked Justin. "I enjoyed it," he said. "I feel sort of tired right now, but that's just because it was the first day. I think this is going to be an easier job than bellhop." "Did you learn anything today?" Rick asked. "I learned a ton of stuff, Rick. One thing I learned is that some people can sure enough be assholes. The second guest I dealt with this morning was pissed off about room service charges on his bill. I thought the man wanted to fight me." "What did you do?" I asked. "I got the supervisor to deal with him, and I just stood there and listened. That's how I learned," he said. "What was the complaint?" I asked. "Okay. Get this. The man had ordered a pot of coffee and an order of toast this morning off the room service menu. I know something about room service from my old job, right? The charge was $7.19, and the man said the menu said it was only a dollar. There ain't a thing on that menu that's only a dollar, much less a pot of coffee and an order of toast. I pulled out a menu and showed it to him, and he got mad. He said the menu in his room said it was only a dollar," Jus said. "That's when I got the supervisor." "You handled that exactly right, Jus. You ought to keep a little notebook of crazy shit like that so you can remember the stories years from now," I said. "I'm sorry I don't have one." "Did you work the front desk?" Jus asked. "Mostly I was in sales, but I did duty on the desk from time to time," I said. "Everybody in management does. What about school? How were your classes?" "Pretty good. I'm going to like 'em, I think. I've got the same lady for English this time as last time. She's really nice. They all are, though," he said. "One thing, though. I didn't register for a biology lab. I didn't know you had to do that, so I had to register for it today. It's only one hour of credit, but the damn thing is three hours long. Only once a week, though. Thursday afternoon." "So, you're taking ten hours. That's almost full-time, Bubba," Rick said. "I know. I'm going to be a busy little bee around this place," he said. "Speaking of being busy, Rick and I were talking this morning about the marathon up in Birmingham," I said. "We're thinking you all aren't really committed to it and that we might be better off postponing that till another year. What do you think?" Rick asked. I was surprised at the reaction. "That would be a load off my back," Justin said. What he said wasn't funny at all, but the way he said it was hilarious to me. "Me, too. Y'all just need to know. I'm getting a lot of pressure at school right now," Kyle said. "I think it's a good idea to postpone running the marathon." "What kind of pressure you getting?" Justin asked. "I had my schedule all set to have two periods of PE and two of Leadership. Piece of cake. Today the drama teacher came to see me during Leadership. She wants me to change my schedule to drop one Leadership and be in drama," he said. "She said she wants me to be in a play. A musical." "I thought you liked being in plays," I said. "I do. But this is a hard one," he said. "What's the play?" I asked. "Grease. You ever heard of it?" Kyle asked. "Of course I have," I said. "Everybody has, Kyle." "I never heard of it," Justin said. "Me, either," Kyle said. "She gave me a movie of it to watch. She wants an answer by Wednesday, too." "What part does she want you for?" I asked. "The part of Danny. I think it might be a pretty big part. She said if I say no, they aren't going to do it and everybody in the drama class is going to be pissed off at me." "She said that?" I asked. I thought that was pretty high handed. "Well, not in so many words, but that's what she meant," he said. "Danny's the lead, Kyle," Rick said. "It's a big singing and dancing role. I think you ought to do it. It might be your once-in-a-lifetime chance to have a leading role in a big musical." "There are probably a dozen kids in that school who would kill for a chance to play that role, Kyle," Brian said. "See. That's another thing. It's dangerous. I could be setting myself up for assassination." We all laughed hard at that one. "Why don't we just watch the damn movie and see what it's like," Justin said. "Where is it?" "It's in my car," Kyle said. "I'll get it," Tim said. I had seen the movie version of Grease at least a dozen times, but I was kind of excited at the prospect of seeing it again, especially with them. I knew that Kyle would love it, and I was eager to see his reaction. He got up and went into the kitchen for a jar of Tick Supreme, that peanut-raisin-M & M snack he made. Tim popped the cassette into the VCR and it came up. Everybody watched with rapt attention as John Travolta, Olivia Newton-John, and all the kids at Rydell High danced and sang away their adolescent concerns. It was so much fun. We stopped the movie about halfway through for a piss break. "Why didn't y'all tell me how cool this thing is?" Kyle demanded. "Does that mean you're going to do it?" Rick asked. "Hell, yeah, I'm going to do it. I'm starting to grow out my hair as of right now," he said. "I'm going to get me a can of motor oil to put on it, too." We all laughed. "Go take your piss so we can get back to it," Rick said. Kyle laughed. "You knew, didn't you?" he said to Rick. Rick grinned at him. "Yeah, I knew," Rick said. "If anybody was ever born to play Danny Zuko it was you, Kyle." We finished the movie, and everybody loved it. "When is the play?" I asked. "Not till after Spring Break. I don't know the exact date. Sometime in April, though," Kyle said. Brian got up and went into the study. He came back about five minutes later. "The play's on April 9th, 10th, 11th, and 12th. That's Thursday through Sunday," he said. "How do you know that?" Kyle asked. "It's on the school Web site," Brian responded. "You didn't know there is a school Web site, did you?" Tim asked Kyle. "No, I didn't," Kyle said. "Your picture's on it, Kyle," Brian said. "No shit?" "No shit," Brian said. Justin pulled Brian down next to him and hugged him. "Listen at you saying those nasty words. What the fuck you think this is? Some kind of damn boot camp or something?" Justin asked, teasing his boy. I loved it when Justin showed that kind of affection for Brian, and Brian loved it, too. "The next thing you know, you'll be smoking cigarettes and drinking whiskey and scratching your balls in public," Justin said. We were all laughing at him, and Brian was laughing the hardest. "How was your first day back, Denny?" Rick asked. "It was good, Rick. I'm taking debate now," he said. "I thought you already were," Rick said. "I've been on the team, but now I'm in the class. The team is an after-school activity," Denny said. "Have you been staying after school every day for debate?" Rick asked. "Yes, sir," Denny said. "How have you been getting home?" I asked. "They wait for me," he said. "You guys wait for him every day?" Rick asked, slightly incredulous. "Yeah, so what?" Kyle asked. "He needs a ride home. The rest of us always have shit to do after school, anyway. It's no big deal." "I'm pretty impressed, guys," Rick said. "Don't be, Rick," Tim said. "We're in a lot of clubs and activities, and on days that we don't have meetings, we do our homework. They keep the library open until four o'clock, and that's where we go to wait. That's why we don't do very much homework at home. We do it at school." "Brian, you've been working out with the dog man and Trixie every day, though, haven't you?" I asked. "Well, not every day. Some days I have to stay after school, but most days. Kyle brings me home, we pick up Trixie, and he takes me to Mr. Mack's place. It works out okay," Brian said. "This is pretty incredible. Why didn't Rick and I know this was going on?" I asked. "Are you angry at us about this?" Brian asked. "No, of course not. I think it's wonderful. I'm just sort of amazed is all," I said. "If your brother needs a ride, you give him a damn ride," Kyle said. "Grease is the word." We all laughed. "Greasy, more like it," Justin said. "Lubed up, you mean," Kyle said. I didn't know where that was going, and I didn't want to find out. "Let's watch the news and then go to bed," I said.
I couldn't believe that Grease movie. I think my new nickname is going to be Greased Lightning. I didn't know the damn thing was about kids and rock-n-roll and drag races and such. That was going to be fun being Danny, and the music was great. 'And oh-oh, those summer night!' I've had me a few of those. Of course they were with Tim and not some girl, but I knew what that was all about. I found the drama teacher, Mrs. Storm, before school the next morning and told her I would do it. She seemed excited that I was willing to take it on, and she marched my ass to the guidance office to change my schedule lickety-split. By then most of my heavy SGA duties were behind me, and I was used to the day-to-day shit of running the ICC, too. Being SGA president was nothing compared to running ICC. I decided that morning that I was going to end every single announcement I made on TV with the words, "Grease is the word." That was going to get some attention because nobody was going to know what that meant. Two or three people asked me about that the first day, and I just told them to stay tuned. In drama class that day we got a copy of the script, and we started reading it out loud. About half the class called Mrs. Storm by her first name, which was Maggie. "Maggie, can Danny sing?" some guy asked. I didn't know him, but I thought he was a senior. "Yes, Michael, Danny can sing," she said. I didn't know who they were talking about. Turns out, they were talking about me. I was only ever going to be called Danny in that class. That didn't bother me, but I wish they had given me a heads up on that. When people change your name for you, you need to know it. This is typical of what I mean. "Danny, can you stay after school today? I want to start you singing," she said. Nobody said a word. "Hello! Earth to Danny! Can you stay today?" Nothing. "Danny?" "She's talking to you, Goodson, you dumbass," my best friend, Philip Andrews, said out loud for everybody to hear. He was going to be in it, too. The class laughed. "Sorry. I missed it," I said. "Can you stay after school today, Danny?" Mrs. Storm asked. "Yes, ma'am," I said. "Kyle, do you mind if we call you Danny? That's sort of a theater tradition," she said. "No, ma'am, that's fine. I just didn't know you were talking to me," I said. "I'll pay attention." I was so fucking embarrassed I wanted to hide my face. I guess it made sense to call me Danny, since that's who I was going to be in the play. But, you know, you've got to tell people stuff like that. You can't expect them to just know it. Especially people like me. I had been in a couple of plays before, but I didn't ever have a name in one before. I guess they called the other people by their character's name in drama class. I just had never taken drama before. We had ninety minutes every day in class to get that play off the ground, but she helped me to understand that day that I was going to put in a lot more time than that after school. That was cool. We'd have a little bit of a logistics problem with getting Brian to Mr. Mack's place to work with Trixie, but that wasn't going to last long. Tim could take him in the meantime. * * * Brian's sixteenth birthday was January 13th, which was a Tuesday that year. If a birthday fell in the middle of a week, we had the party the following Saturday. Well, guess what? We couldn't for him that year because we were leaving on Friday, January 16th, for North Carolina to go skiing over the Martin Luther King, Jr., long weekend. So we had to have his party on January 10th. He wanted a cookout. Hotdogs, hamburgers, ribs--that kind of stuff. So be it. That was very easy. But no way could I just serve that for my brother Brian. I made up a big pot of really good chili con carne and another pot of chili sauce to put on the hotdogs. I made some of that filé gumbo we had had in New Orleans at Christmas and a big mess of red beans and rice, too. I also made some corn salad, with onions, green peppers, oil and vinegar, and frozen nibblet corn--thawed, of course. That was real good. Justin loved that stuff. Brian wasn't big on raw oysters, so I boiled shrimp to serve in the rough before that meal with cocktail sauce and some of that remoulade sauce I had tasted at the Boardwalk Hotel the night of the Homecoming dance. That damn chef wouldn't give me the recipe for the remoulade, so Tim and I went there one night and ordered five servings each of that stuff. We ate it till we figured out what was in it. What I made was pretty close to it, if not exactly on the money. Tim, Justin, and Denny and I worked pretty hard on that meal, but it was a labor of love for our brother. Tim and I gave Brian a really nice dog whistle as his present. He blew into it when he opened it. Nobody heard a thing, but Trixie jumped up on the table in front of him. She didn't ever do stuff like that, ordinarily. Philip was sitting across from Brian. Not only did Philip get a good whiff of dog ass, he got his face slapped by her tail a few times. Everybody was laughing so hard I thought they were going to vomit. Justin gave him a bunch of clothes, which he needed. He was still growing. He loved them, too. Then there was this stack of envelopes. Everybody knew he wanted money to buy a car, and that's what he got. I gave him the money I owed him for modeling for me. When all was said and done, that boy had gotten six thousand dollars. He was so happy. He knew that with what he already had, he had enough for a car. The last envelope was the best, though, and all of us were waiting patiently for him to get to it. It was big, like a manila envelope, only it was white and not tan. He felt it pretty good before he opened it. I was already on pins and needles, but he took his own sweet time about it. He finally opened the envelope and pulled out a framed certificate. Kevin's secretary had made up a real nice one that said Brian was the one and only official owner of Trixie Foley Mashburn Mathews. Everybody in the family had signed it. When he read that thing, big, hot, happy tears just gushed out of his eyes. He grabbed Justin up in a hug that I'm sure must have hurt ole Jus, it was so hard, and he hugged the rest of us hard, too. God, he was so happy. And the rest of us were just standing there like fools, crying our eyes out for our little brother. We knew never to ask him who he loved more, Justin or Trixie, for fear of what he might say. Now she was his for the rest of her life. "I can't believe you guys," he said through his tears. "Thank you so much." "I guess that settles where Trixie will be living in a year-and-a-half," Kevin said. It had been his idea to do that, and we all loved it. "Oh, Kevin," he started to say but couldn't get past that for crying. "I think we've made my boy happy," Justin said. "Thank all of you." Then he cried some more, too. That was about the most emotional thing we had ever had happen at a birthday party, and it was right up there in the top two or three most emotional things ever. I felt so good that we were able to make him so happy. He had a wad of money in front of him, and he was going to be able to get himself a car. What mattered most to him? That he owned Trixie and that our family had given her to him. Nothing was going to change, of course. She was still going to run almost every morning with Rick, and she was still going to play with all of us like she always did. She would never know the difference. Who did know the difference was Brian. He'd never have to give her up, for one thing, and he knew how much we loved him, for another thing. Pretty good for one present that didn't cost a dime, I thought. "Kyle, what you guys did is something I will remember the rest of my life," Brian said to me later. "What? Give you a dog whistle? That's a nice whistle, but that ain't really all that much, Bubba," I said. "You know what I'm talking about," he said. God, he was cute. Justin would be a total fool to ever leave that boy or ever let him get away. "Yeah, I do know what you mean. We love you, though, Brian. Really. I'm not just talking about Justin and Rick and Kevin, and me and Tim. A lot of people love you." "This is sort of blowing my mind, you know?" he said. "All that money on top of everything." "I'm sure it is, Bri. But you know what?" "What?" Brian asked. "People wouldn't have done that if they hadn't wanted to," I said. He teared up big when I said that, but it was the truth. I think he knew that in the abstract, but he had concrete proof positive that night. "I want my first prostate exam as a doctor to be you," he said. I laughed hard. "Okay. It's a deal, Bubba," I said. "Which finger?" He thought that was funny. "You'll never know, but I guarantee you'll never forget it, Kyle," he said. God Almighty! What a cutie, I thought. * * * Brian had enough money to buy a car after the party, and of course he knew just exactly what kind of car he wanted. It surprised the hell out of me, but he wanted a Mazda 626, just like I had. "Why do you want that?" I asked. "We've already got a truck and a Jeep. I want a regular car. I can't afford anything sporty, and I like your car. It runs good, it's comfortable, it looks good, and I can pick up a year-old rental car for $11,000," he said. "You thought this through, didn't you?" I said. "Yeah," he said. "What color you want? Whatever they got?" I asked. I hadn't gotten to chose the color of my car. A guy who works for Goodson just drove it up on my birthday, and that was it. I didn't care, either. I was so excited about having wheels I would have taken anything. The only thing I cared about was having a light-colored cloth-upholstered interior, and that's what I got. Emerald Beach was way too hot for anything else. The car itself was dark green, and that was fine with me. I would have liked to have a University of Florida tag, but I couldn't since it was a lease. I know people who would pitch a fit about such as that, but Mr. Gene don't allow no fit pitching in his house. I've known that all my life, so I don't even get revved up. "The color doesn't matter. Justin took me to the dealership the other day just to look around, and they had a really nice dark gray one. It had about 38,000 miles on it, and I'd get the full three-year warrantee. Your dad said I get free insurance through the company, too," he said. That ain't for everybody, Little Buddy, I thought. You, me, Kevin, Rick, my mama, Jeff. Maybe Tim. That's about the end of that list. That was the kind of stuff I didn't know much about and didn't care. I wasn't much of a car man, that's for sure. I heard guys talking about changing their own oil and putting on new brake pads and shit like that. Not me. Tyler can do all that stuff for himself, but that's why they have mechanics and oil-change places, as far as I was concerned. The only reason I ever even washed it myself was to get naked in the back yard with my buds and play in the water. "So when are you going to go pick it out?" I asked. That day was his real birthday. "This afternoon. Rick's going to meet us at the driver's license place at three, and we're going to the dealership from there," he said. "Cool. Are you excited?" "Yeah, I am, Kyle. I'm very excited," he said. I could tell he was. Me, Tim, and Justin took Brian to the driver's license place, and we met up with Rick. Brian only had to take the road test because he had taken the written part to get his permit. He used my car, and he passed it with flying colors, too. I looked at the picture on his license, and I was disgusted. This face is hanging on the wall of a fucking museum in Phoenix, Arizona, I thought, and in this license picture he looks like he's twelve years old and sick as a damn dog. I wished there was some way I could touch that thing up. When we got to the dealership, Rick had to try to get the man down off the price, of course. And he did, too, by $500. Brian and Tim were there just soaking up everything that was going on between those guys. Me and Justin were roaming around the lot looking at the cars. "You still want a Jeep?" Justin asked me. "Naw, not no more," I said. "I love driving Tim's, but that's not a very practical vehicle with as many people as we're always hauling around." "My pickup's not practical for that, either, but, Kyle, I love that truck," he said. "I know, but your truck is practical for a lot of other things. My God, how many times have we hauled shit in your truck? Every family needs a truck, Bubba, and yours is it for us," I said. "Well, it's serviceable, that's for sure. Kyle, do you think the four of us are always going to be together?" he asked. "Where the hell did that come from, Justin?" I asked. "I'm just trying to plan cars for the future, Kyle," he said. "If the two couples are going to be together, then one of us always needs to have a pickup. I reckon that's going to be me." "You're working on your thirty-year vehicle acquisition plan, are you?" "Shut up, you little fuck, before I have to kick your balls off right here in this parking lot," he said. We both started laughing hard. I loved Justin. He was the funniest guy I had ever known, bar none. * * * I wanted us to leave for North Carolina right after school on Thursday. It would have been hard, but there were six of us who could drive. It was about an eight-hour trip, and if we left right at 2:30, we could have been there right at 10:30, 11:30 Eastern time, which is what North Carolina was in. "No, we can't do that," Rick said. "Why not?" I asked. "Your brother has his biology lab from two to five that afternoon. He can't afford to miss that. It would be 5:30 before we could get away from here, and it'll already be dark. We'd be getting there at 1:30 in the morning, worn slap out," Rick said. "I see your point," I said. "I see it, too, and it ain't nearly as big as I thought it would be," Justin said. Everybody in the room but Rick laughed. He looked kind of confused. "Say it, Babe," Kevin said. "Say what?" Rick demanded. "Justin got you last, Rick," Kevin said. It finally dawned on Rick what had been going on, and he laughed. He told Justin he got him last. We might have to refine that game some, I thought. Did somebody really get you last if you didn't know you had been got last? We'd have to work on that. Come Friday morning, we were all up early. We had the car all packed up, and we were ready to go by seven o'clock. We did a drive-thru at a fast-food place for breakfast, and, by my calculations, we could be on the slopes that very afternoon. "I've never seen snow," Denny said. "It's awesome, dude," I said. "Will there be somebody to teach me how to ski?" Denny asked. "Yeah, Den. I'll need to take some lessons, too," Brian said. "They give lessons." "Is it scary?" Denny asked. "No, it ain't scary. It's fun," Justin said. "Brian and I have only been once, but I can't wait." "Denny, if you're scared to ski, you don't have to," Brian said. "They have snow tubing, which is riding down in big inner tubes. I'll do that with you if you're scared." "Me, too," Tim said. "Recreation is supposed to be fun, Denny, not scary so that it makes you uncomfortable." Tim and Brian were way nicer than me. I mean, I'd do that with him a time or two, but I wasn't missing skiing because of him. No way. "I want to try skiing, but I've never even seen a mountain," Denny said. "Well, let me tell you something, Denny. These mountains ain't much compared to what we saw in Montana. They have some manly mountains out there," Justin said. "The pictures of them on the Web site are incredible," Denny said. "I'd love to go there one day." "You hang with this family, son, and you'll be all over the damn place," Jus said. "I want to say something," Denny said. Everybody got quiet. He didn't say that much, so I knew everybody wanted to know what was on his mind. "Before I lived here, I didn't laugh. Ever. Now I laugh every day. A lot. You probably don't understand that, but it feels so good," Denny said. Everybody was quiet. "Denny, I didn't ever laugh, either, before I came here," Justin said. "I had some years like that, too, Denny," Kevin said. "So did I," I said. "Me, too," Brian said. "I can't believe I'm not the only one who has had that kind of life," Denny said. "You're not, though, Denny. All of us have, in one way or another," Justin said. "That's something we all share, Bubba. You know? Rick and Tim didn't say anything, but it wasn't all peaches and cream for them, either," he said. "Denny, I didn't have many problems with being different when I was a kid. I knew it very early, and my mother had always gone out of her way to let me know it was all right if I was different. It wasn't until Kevin and I got together that it started for me. My step-dad, Arnie, the guy who would now defend me and all of us to the death if he had to, was extremely cold toward me, and especially toward Kevin," Rick said. "People change, though, when they see real love." "I sort of always knew I was different, too, Denny," Tim said. "I always thought it was because I didn't have a mom. When puberty started, I knew what it really was. My dad loved me as much as anybody could ever love a kid, and I always knew he wouldn't have a problem with me being gay. Until I met Kyle, though, I couldn't accept that about myself. Kyle, I've never even talked to you about this before, but I felt as isolated and cut off as you did before we met." "I knew that," I said. "Denny, you've been around us for almost six months. You've seen us every which way. You've seen us happy, like at Thanksgiving and Christmas and Brian's birthday last week, and you've seen us sad, like when Alex and Cody left. We laugh a lot because we love one another and we're having fun." Denny was a little moist around the eyes, but I knew those were happys, not sads. "Does anybody else have to pee?" Justin asked. Brian didn't even wait for an answer. He swung the car into the off ramp that was right there, and we all scurried out to take care of our business. "Come here," Rick said to me in the store we had stopped at. "What?" I demanded. I knew we were in tease mode. "Kyle, he's coming along, isn't he?" Rick asked me. "Who you mean? Denny?" "Yeah," he said. "Rick, he's happier than a pig in slop," I said. "That little boy's going to be fine, you know?" "Kyle, I wanted to say this the other night, but I didn't want to say it in front of all of them. Thank you for being so good to them, son." That made me feel so good, I was just about to bust. "I make 'em mind. They know I'll bust their ass if they don't," I said. "Cut the shit, Kyle. You're forgetting who you're talking to," he said. I laughed. "You do it all because you love them. Thank you, Bubba." I about melted into the floor. I was up to drive next, and that gave me time to think. Driving that Chevy Suburban was like driving a cloud, and I was able to make some very good time on that highway. I thought about how lucky we all were and about how much I loved Kevin and Rick. * * * We got to the cabin about 2:30 Central time. Of course, it was on Eastern time, so it was really 3:30. We threw our stuff in our rooms and hauled ass to the ski slopes. It was too late for lessons, so we went down a beginner's slope because of Justin and Tim. Brian and Denny didn't even try it, and Tim and Justin were both scared. They made it down, but they didn't enjoy it all that much. After the second run, Tim and Jus got their ski legs. They had a much better time going down three or four more runs. We didn't stay late. We were all starving, but it was going to be too late to cook when we got home. Plus, we didn't have anything to cook. We went through a pizza drive-thru that we had been to before. We called ahead and told them what we wanted, and it was there waiting for us when we got there. After we ate, we all went in the hot tub. It was pretty damn cold out of that water, but, in the tub, it was wonderful. By 10:30 we were all dozing. That was the end of the first day of what was going to be a great trip. |